Tuesday, January 15, 2002

Moving On...

Good morning.

It is 11:30am, I've been online all morning, not surfing for jobs but chatting on Instant Messenger with friends and family. It iced and snowed some last night, enough to give both Doug and Jessica a delay of start this morning. I took Geoff to school, came back here... and since 10am have just been kind of hanging out.

I have a list of things I want to accomplish while I'm laid off. Here it goes:

1. Clean the house so clean you'd think we were moving out. That means all the floors UNDER things (ie mop under the couch instead of just sweep... Jessica's carpet and our carpet fully shampooed... the whole 9 yards).

2. Shelving in both the kids rooms so they have places to put their shit.

3. Rearrange the living room after taking the Christmas tree out. That means moving the fish tank, relocating the green couch someplace, putting the Nordic Track in the livingroom instead of our bedroom

4. Reorganizing the cupboards. They are a friggin mess.

5. Journaling on a daily basis. Duh, you'd think I'd stop?

6. Measure the ceiling area for how much sheetrock we'll need, and go buy it, thus forcing Doug's hand. HA!

7. can anyone say "Basement?"

8. Depending on how long I'm laid off, I'd also like to do some volunteer work at Jessie's school.

I could be laid off for a long while or a short while depending on what happens Friday. My buddy who hooked me up at the company where I just got canned from has been working for the past several months for another company. They are making a profit AND growing, which is something no one is doing right now. I don't want to mention the company in case I get a job there.

I have an interview lined up for Friday morning. It's a job doing technical support in the user forums, handling complaints, helping users troubleshoot their problems. My buddy does phone support, so I'd be doing email support. I've got extensive experience doing that (Sidebar: At the company from which I've been cast out, during my first few months there, we implemented an online benefits enrollment tool. 6000 people hit it at once. Killed it. Some people lost their network connectivity, or their networking team never put it in so they couldn't access the tool. I became the triage queen of tech support, figuring out which email was a user problem, which was a networking problem, which was a tool-based problem, and I'd respond accordingly. I personally handled about 800 emails in a week. It was hell, but fun at the same time).

Theoretically I could have a job in a week or so.

But do I want it?

Let's ponder the pros and the cons, shall we:

Pro: It's a job. So many people can't get a call back, I got a call the day I got laid off. This is a gift

Con: It's a dot.com... do I want to go work at another dot.com?

Pro: My buddy works there and he rocks.

Con: He worked at the last company, see where it got me?

Pro: He tells me it is the funnest, coolest place to work ever.

Con: Who gives a shit. Corporate culture at internet companies is a waste of money, killer of productivity... I don't care how much free soda or snacks or how many pool tables you have, if you aren't making scads of dough, you won't be there long.

Pro: Close, very close, to my Fuddruckers Buddies, Ben, Brian and Dan.

Con: We will no longer be close to Fuddruckers. Damn.

Pro: It pays more than unemployment

Con: But I need a break from working and I get paid until March 18th anyway... why jump right back into things?

Pro: It prevents any gaps in my resume and looks really good.

Con: Hearkening back to the dot.com thing, perhaps I should wait and look hard for THE perfect job. What if this isn't THE perfect job. What if I could find a teaching position at a local school doing technology stuff... I haven't even EXPLORED that angle yet. I should wait. Yeah. I should hold on.

Pro: This is a gift landing in your lap. If they offer it. Take it. Don't pussyfoot around. There are friends of yours who were laid off in March of last year who are STILL unemployed. This is a great opportunity...

Con: Meh.

One of the big fears I have is not taking another job right away... and then not being able to find one after March 18th. I mean, if I get offered this, and pass on it, and decide to take time and live life as a stay at home mommy, then I am unable to find work, I am so screwed! Unemployment is only like 450 bucks a week. Currently I'm making, or I WAS making, 54,000 a year.

I am kind of scared... jumping right back into something. I mean the ink isn't even dry yet on my RIF papers.

This all could be put aside if they don't like me over there. My buddy insists I'd be a super fit and they'll love me, but what if they don't....? What if they pass on ME and then I can't find anything.

Jesus. All this and it hasn't even been 24 hours since I got the call.

And, in light of that, I read my friend Chrissy's Colloquy today and sat here and cried and cried. It's about her mom, and how she lost her and how guilty she feels because she didn't get to say goodbye.

Things can always be worse can't they? Man.

I have been feeling amazingly optimistic in light of all this and I'm going to continue to feel optimistic. I'm not going to let any of the Pros/Cons up there bum me out. I'm having lunch at my favorite sub shop with Ben, Brian, Dan and Michelle today. And I'm going to enjoy this first day of my non-employment. This sub shop has the BEST steak tip sub on EARTH. I haven't been there in well over a year and a half, and the lady who works there still asks the guys how I am. We used to go there at least once a week when I worked at the college. Sometimes we'd get lunch and go back to Dan's house and play Uno for lunch. It was such a good time. I'm going to enjoy being closer to them, just so I can see them more often. I have whined in here before about how much I miss them, but it's true. I really do. I had such a good time with them that leaving the college was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.

Plus I had to leave that steak tip sub also... insert Homer Simpson drooly noise here.

Okay. I need to shower, post this, and get a move on. I have a lot of stuff I wanted to write, fun upbeat shit that has been on my mind lately that I haven't had a chance to write down. Being freed from work means I will hopefully have a chance to put up the things I'm thinking, and grow this journal the way I want to grow it.

Go Steelers!

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