Tuesday, April 30, 2002

Triceratops Central

I had forgotten to mention that the night before the funeral there was snow. I thought it was funny in a bizarre sense. Not really funny funny, like Ha Ha funny... more like creepy funny.

I mean, it took all winter for there to be any snow. Winter ends, and we get snow. To go to his funeral in 8 inches of snow, I think he'd be laughing at us. We only got about 2 inches, and it was pretty much gone by the time we got to the funeral. But it was odd nonetheless.

Not much to report really...

Doug took all the clothing to the Salvation Army yesterday. He was on a mission. He has had a hard time dealing with this, and his hurried and was rather brusque while getting the items out of the house. It is just him trying to deal, he's not being an asshole. I was rather slow and pokey in going through what remained... and he got snippy with me. I got defensive. When I'm down, I'm slow. And yesterday I guess I was too slow. So we griped at one another for a while, and he and I both apologized and I sped up and he got less snippy. It worked out rather nicely in the end. We went out to lunch at the tavern in Georgetown, had a beer and a burger. Geoff was charming to the waitress.

I kept two flannel shirts of his, one of which he outgrew in 1999, the other of which I never got the chance to see him wearing. They're both nice, and warm... and I'll think of him every time I wear them. Doug retained his leather jacket, which is too big for him, but still looks nice on him.

He asked me "Do I look like the Mack Daddy of Merrimack Valley in this thing?"

Yes Doug, you do, and it's giving mad props to the man who left it behind.

We've only got the CDs, Magic cards and books left. Doug will do some research on the Magic cards to make sure we get a good deal on them. They are entire sets from the beginning. They look really nice... I wish I'd learned how to play Magic.

I said the other day that having no regrets is a nice thing. I guess I have only one. I wish I'd learned to play guitar or bass while I had him here. We would have made a kick ass ensemble. But for me, the desire to jam with was outweighed by the desire to just listen. I'll always have that.

Getting back to life is going slowly.

I forgot Jessica had a field trip today to Olde Sturbridge Village or some crap like that. She reminded me last night. Oy. She also didn't do her book report which was due yesterday, so she hurriedly finished it last night.

I was angry with her because she knew it was due... but on the other hand, I know that the last Monday of every month is book report day, and so I dropped the reminder ball.

I've been rather forgetful. We have bills that were due yesterday, and some due in the next 2 days, that I hadn't written the checks out for, so I hurriedly did that while she hurriedly did her report.

She had to be up to the school at 7:15 this morning to meet the class and go on the bus. I got her there in time after stopping for a pop-tart and Gatorade and snack for her lunchbag at the local Kwikiemart. Doug didn't look like he was going to go to work again today... he was slow to rise, slow to decide whether or not, and slow to ready, but he got out the door only 10 minutes late and I'm proud of him. He is taking this all extra hard. And there's nothing I can do but be nice. He just called, found out he has a meeting this afternoon that will run until 5:30 so he's kind of pissed and whiny. Nothing I could do but be nice.

I'm on the verge of pissing people off by not meeting my web design obligations. I have to find a good e-commerce host for the dart people and do a ton of work for the catering guys, so I have to get snapping. It's been so hard for me to focus. When I sit down here, I just stare at the PC. I actually got sick to my stomach last night when trying to research e-commerce sites, so I walked away. Tonight I have to nail that down. And I have to spend time today doing cateringman's stuff. I'm glad it finally stopped raining. Perhaps Geoff can play outside or with the neighbor girls while I work. I have to buckle down and concentrate.

I promised Geoff we'd run errands today. Don't ask. He loves errands. We have to go to the market, and pick up a prescription for me and for the dog, and I have film to be developed, so there are plenty of errands to do. I just don't feel like it just yet. I want to go back to bed or just sit and watch tv. I could use another day of nothing. But that would make me feel like I want another day of nothing. I want to call his sister and say hi and see how she is. Pick a time for that dinner in the city she wants to make for us.

Oh, and watching "The Sixth Sense" the other night was a BIGassed mistake, I should add.

I cried and cried my ass off at the end. I love Haley Joel Osment, and he is so good in this movie as the "I see dead people" kid. The whole character evolution, how sweet and lovely he is. It reminds me why I need to rail about A.I. (Dave B. said I didn't get the ending but oh I did. It sucked)... but I'll do that another day. The movie also takes place in Philly, and I remember watching it with him and having him point out all the places he'd been, and how this place and that place were so cool. So seeing them all again just made me cry. I tortured myself, it is true. I didn't have to watch, but it is such a good movie. If you've never seen it, I highly recommend it. Wonderful twist at the end... I didn't see it coming.

Geoff has been in nerdy little boy heaven with all of CAL's Triceratops figures... what's left of the original collection that he had.

He'd gone through a phase where he collected Triceratops related items. Why? Good question. We never figured it out. He did a website on "The Mighty Triceratops" which has vanished due to Geocities being dopes, and his IM id was MightyTrike, or MyTTrike... depending on which he wanted to use.

Triceratops was his favorite dinosaur, as if one needed to pick one, because it was the only one that could stand up to T-Rex and win. Plus, he said he was built like a Triceratops. Big and slow and smart. So he was into it.

A little too into it I might add. We'd talked a lot about how he had an addictive personality... if it wasn't fantasy baseball, or Magic, or D&D, it was the Triceratops... and then other things.

Geoff is oblivious to what people are going through right now, and I'm glad he is. He is so over emotional about stuff at times, so I think if he were 10 and dealing with losing his big buddy, he wouldn't do well.

He's happy to have the Triceratops, and asks about Ivy and how she's doing because she was sad when she was at our house this weekend, and he wants to see her again and give her a painting.

Jessica is dealing well, but it has been so long since she has really spent time with him that the impact on her is a lot less than what one might think. The important lesson here for her is the drug lesson... what happens to people when they slip into addiction is very serious. And it leaves quite a mess behind. So her eyes are open... her understanding is clear. I'm glad she's my kid. She's amazing to me.

There are a friggin ton of Triceratops (Triceratopses? Triceratae?) in my house right now and it is making me laugh.

Well, I'm going to save this and post it. I'm going to eat breakfast. Geoff's watching Bob the Builder, and we need to get going.

Time to live. Time to run errands.

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