Thursday, May 15, 2003

Geoff's Broken Arm, The Crunchy and Snappy show...

The Summer of the Emergency Room continues. First Jack, now Geoff.

I got home from work around 5:15 yesterday afternoon and Geoff was in his room crying. Doug told me he had fallen down while playing kickball nextdoor with our neighbor girl (her dad was playing too). Steve, the dad, had walked him home and said he fell backwards and put his arm out to stop the fall, and said that his wrist and arm hurt. So Doug looked at it, and it didn't look bad at all. He (and I) thought it was Geoff's usual histrionics at work. He carried on for a while, and I went in to see him.

He was on his bed, on his back, and was just pathetically crying. "Can you pick your arm up so mommy can see?" I asked him, thinking I'd just be giving him some extra mommy love and then I'd get his mind off the subject and we'd move on.

"I can't lift my arm up at all!" He cried. So I reached down to lift it for him. He tried to scoot away like a small injured animal. When I lifted his arm, all around the wrist was swollen like nothing I've ever felt on a kid before, and when I flipped the wrist over to look he screamed and cried.

This was for real -- I called Doug in. Doug took one look and we both said, "Huhyeah. Emergency room."

Doug got an ice pack. I got G's shoes back on and Doug put his arm up in a sling with the ice. Once we did that he mellowed out... and we got into the truckster and went to the local hospital.

We were in and out in 90 minutes. Record time for an emergency room visit. The physician's assistant on call was really nice and explained to me after seeing his X-ray that he has a "green stick" fracture. I'd never heard of it, but essentially it's the term they use when a bone is fractured the same way you'd bend and try and break a young stick or twig or branch. It doesn't break all the way through, but you see splitting and twisting on the branch. That's exactly what it looked like on the film.

She splinted him up and he has to get his permanent cast on today...

This picture is hysterical. His "Oh NO!"
Kevin in Home Alone hand on his cheek slays me.

His sense of humor was not sprained or injured. On several occasions he had the hospital staff in stitches (pun intended) with jokes and just plain Geoffrey-esque comments.

We were waiting in the X-ray area, and he walked up to the front desk there and said "Excuse me ma'am, I'd like to place an order. I'd like a double cheeseburger with doublesized fries..." and everyone started laughing.

When the PA was splinting him, he very casually said, "So, you fix people up here a lot?" And it sounded like a pick-up line. So funny.

Another nurse came in to help, and he looked at her and said "I'm sorry. You'll have to come back later. We're busy." with this deadpan facial expression. The nurse and PA laughed and laughed. They all hugged him when he left.

It was quite a fun experience. Nice nursing staff and great doctor... sorry I had to meet them.

Anyway. The bummer is that today at Geoff's school they are doing their annual Bike-A-Thon to benefit St. Jude's children's hospital. For the past week Geoff has been getting psuper psyched to go to school and ride bikes with his friends. He invented a bike gang of all his school mates called the "BikeRiders" only he doesn't spell it like that.

This is the Bacraders. You can hear the accent, cool and slick:
Bahk Raaaaders!"

He just came up behind me and told me the Bacraders don't ride bikes anymore. They just sing songs.

I love that picture... notice there are no bikes. But notice also the guys with other guys standing on their heads, and the cool watch that one guy has. The Bacraders are the coolest gang around!

Aaron said that Geoff's new nickname is "Snappy" now. And with Jack being "Crunchy" you can actually sing the Itchy and Scratchy theme song with their names in place. "The Crunchy and Snappy Show!"

Doug is taking the day off of work to take Geoff to get his cast on. He gets Paid Time Off and I don't. So I'll go in to work and be all schmoopy and sad for my baby.

Geoff's in good spirits. He slept on the couch with his arm elevated, woke up at 3 and we gave him more acetaminophen and he went back to sleep. He got up at six, his usual haunting hour, and has had breakfast and snack and is trying to play his gameboy one handed.

And the wonderful thing is, he's a lefty and he broke his left wrist. Great. So the remainder of this school year is luckily four weeks, and the cast will probably come off by the end of school, I'm thinking.


I will leave you with this thought...

One of the Journalspace journals that I was reading proposed this notion: You cannot go a day in life without a monkey reference crossing your path.

For instance, he cites you hear a Gorillaz song on the radio. Or Homer Simpson sees "Apes A Poppin'" on video and is all happy. Someone calls GWB a chimp.

I realized this guy is right. You cannot go a day without some sort of monkey reference! And remember -- this includes Chimps, Apes, Monkies, Gorillas -- anything... well, monkey.

This is day five of me monitoring my monkey references. And I plan on doing so. Mind you -- I cannot make the monkey reference and count it. Someone else has to, or you have to see a picture or commercial or TV Show. Here are my examples so far. And until I tire of counting these, I will post them.

1. Sunday: Homer Simpson watching "Editor in Chimp" at the video store on "The Simpsons"

2. Monday: BNL blog references them writing/recording a song called "Chimps."

3. Tuesday: Another Simpsons Monkey reference with Mr. Teeney, Howard Stern show repeatedly playing the "ma ma monkey" soundbyte when Gary was trying to explain something.

4. Wednesday: Doug said something about monkies while we were hanging out on the couch. I explained the monkey spotting theory to him, and he wanted to know why someone would even bother monitoring monkey references (I'm sure you're thinking the same thing about me right now). I think it's ... just because you can.

5. Today: Five minutes ago Geoff came to me and said he can't pick things up with his hand so he has to pick stuff up with his feet like monkeys on Discovery Channel.

Start monitoring your monkey references. I bet you find there are far more monkey references than say Horse references or ... well... Abe Vigoda references.

I've gotta get ready for work. As sad as that is. More later.

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