No matter how hard I try to be organized, I'm just plain not... I am the single most disorganized person on this planet. So, I've started making lists. And the lists help a little bit, but I end up being obsessed with the list, and then I become anxious, and I start to hyperventilate...
You get the picture.
Today I left work later than I'd intended. I had a lot to do, but I had to cram two weeks worth of work into one week, and I got pretty much 80% to where I wanted to be. I wanted to make sure there was little or nothing that C and MB or G had to do in my absence. As is, all they need to do is preview the content, make sure I didn't totally F up the order and whatnot, and insert the specials for one chain, which won't come until like Wednesday anyway. I did get to enjoy one beverage for our Beverage Friday. Would have liked two, but... I needed to jet.
There were errands I needed to complete. I wanted to get the car inspected, get home by 5pm, and get the dogs to take them to the kennel. Part of me said "Leave the car for Doug, and take the truck. That way if you are running late you can just get the dogs and HE can get the car inspected."
But I figured I could get it done.
First, I went to a service station where there were two cars ahead of me. Waiting. After a few minutes wait, I got out of the car to ask how long the wait for an inspection might be. The woman in the car ahead of me got out and said "Excuse me, I'm ahead of you."
I was somewhat astonished and said "Uh, yeah. I know that. I am just asking how long this is going to take."
"Oh." She said as she crossed her arms. "I thought you were trying to jump the line."
"Uh, no." Y'all know me. I'm not into entitlement.
I turned back to the mechanic and he told me that he was experiencing some technical difficulties with the machine, and it might take a little while. There was a car in the bay, and another guy was messing with the machine. It appeared as if the thing wasn't printing, or something. And these things are hooked up to the state so if you try it again it'll show fraud and it gets ugly...
"Well," said the woman ahead of me, "Perhaps that car failed the inspection and you should try another car."
So now, she's an expert. Pfth.
The mechanic let her know kindly that indeed, the car didn't fail, the machine was spazzing out. I decided to leave and try another garage. There used to be one at every gas station. Not every gas station has the emissions inspection station anymore, so I ended up in Salem.
I got in line behind another car. There was a car in the bay. After a few minutes, the guy came out and said "Hey, I'm closing at five. I can't go past five. You're gonna have to come back tomorrow."
Well, I won't be there tomorrow.
I realized, to my horror, it was now 4:50pm. I called Doug. He was just getting to camp to get Geoff. There was no way he was going to be able to get back to the house and get the dogs to the kennel on time. I thought of calling and postponing our ferry reservation tomorrow just so we could inspect the car and drop off the dogs.
I ended up rushing my ass home and calling the kennel to let them know I'd be late. They normally close at 5. The kid said he'd stick around for me. I owe him a cake. I got there at 5:45, dropped off my furry boys (I miss them horribly already!) and came home to beer. Doug will take the car to get inspected on Monday August 1st, a day later than we need it done by... but there is a garage 200 feet from our house that he can hit on that morning, and get the car taken care of.
We really do try to take care of stuff in advance. We try to get all our ducks (oops, I typed dicks. Ha!) in a row. But sometimes, that just does not work. Today was one of them.
So I did indeed make a list. Before leaving and after leaving, there are a number of things I must accomplish. The list is fairly simple for the next couple of days.
- I need to mail a request to our doctor to HIPPA release some medical files to camp for Jess and Geoff (I can't find my copies, so if I send them an envelope addressed to the camp they should have no problem).
- I need to fill out forms for them for the weeks that got monkey wrenched.
- I need to swing by the bank and check our balances to make sure that we have money.
- I need to make sure I have a note to the tenant to put the trash out on Wednesday, and to water the plants if it does not rain over the next few days.
- I need to decide if I'm shaving my legs, or doing a massive Agent Orange deforestation of my inner thighs...
- I need to finish packing.
- I wanted to burn a mix CD for our trip. But that may not happen.
- I need to pack the travel bugs, the camera, the GPS...
- I need to print out CJK and Smitty's cell phone numbers to have them handy for the ride.
- I need another beer...
There is a lot I have on my mind too, in addition to our lives, vacation and listmaking.
A really, really good friend of mine and his wife (another really, really good friend) may be splitting up. Dimes to dollars. If I were a betting man, I'd put money on the "so long it's over" square on the craps table.
I've spent a shit ton of time talking to him, but she won't talk to me... which breaks my heart. I always thought she would be able to pick up the phone and just talk to me and I'd let her know what I think or just let her say things that she needs to say. But she's avoiding me. As happens in this kind of situation.
This friend, the guy in the relationship, may be moving very very very far away, and this is something that totally breaks my heart.
I want him to be happy. I want her to be happy. I want them to make decisions that work for both of them. I don't want me and my feelings about where they should be (married and together and happy, damnit!) to impact their decisions.
I'm so sad. Really, painfully sad. And over the course of the next couple of weeks their future hangs in the balance. If he moves far far away, I will be devastated. I can't even imagine how he and she both feel (devastated) if I'm outside the picture and feel this way.
Several of my friends have split up. Some of them not so happily. Others are friends now long into the years after they've gone their own ways. It's like a lame Fleetwood Mac song. And I can't listen to "Landed" by Ben Folds without just falling apart.
The other night on the phone with me, he made me cry. He asked me "What do I do with the dog? The dog never broke my heart... I can't leave him behind... can I?"
I don't know.
You gotta do what you gotta do baby. That's all I can say. If he or she is reading. It'll all work out in the end. I love you both so unimaginably deeply. Please know that.
Alright -- that is too damn sad. I need to go move some laundry around. I'm outta here for a week. I will update you all and regale you with tales of utter joy and fun from the road, in August.