Throughout the entire post-Newtown CT shooting tragedy there have been heartfelt tributes to the "26 victims" of Adam Lanza's terroristic shooting spree. Just ... 26. Church bells around this country pealed 26 times today. There are "26 angels" watching over us all, from Newtown to every town.
But there is a 27th victim that everyone seems to be purposely and deliberately overlooking. His mother Nancy.
Personally, I have purposely and deliberately eschewed a lot of the news reports surrounding this story. I do not want to wallow in the national sadness, and it gets none of us anywhere to sit for 24 hours in front of a TV and look at pictures of beautiful children and their teachers, all dead.
And I am about 500% done with friends on Facebook and Twitter furiously freaking out on either side of any political fence surrounding this pasture of sadness. Relentlessly.
There are too many crazy people, lock them all up! We need more compassion to help those with mental illness! There are too many automatic and semi automatic weapons and they should all be banned, hell ALL guns should be banned! There aren't enough guns! If teachers had guns, or if there was a trained guard at the door, no one would be dead today except Adam Lanza. There are too many violent video games and TV shows in the world! It's all his mother's fault everyone is dead. It's not his mother's fault, he would have found a way to kill her and others whether or not those guns were hers.
I don't understand why Adam Lanza did what he did, I don't. I don't think anyone ever will. And I am okay with us never understanding why. We don't need an answer really other than evil finds evil, no matter what.
But as a parent of a kid who isn't 100% perfect, who is weird and who has said and done things in the past that disturb and frighten the disturbable and frightenable, well... I can't help but feel horrible for Nancy Lanza. And the fact that her death does not matter, is not counted amongst the victims, saddens me to my core.
I am sure she did the best she could with the hand she was dealt. I have to fault her with keeping weapons IN HER HOUSE (duh) with a child/adult living there who simply was not doing well mentally from all accounts. But does she deserve to be brushed aside, hated, denied a place with the other 26?
Am I alone in this? If I am, that's okay. Tonight I have a burning candle and equally burning tears for a mom who ... well, didn't deserve this, and doesn't deserve to be forgotten.