Saturday, April 17, 2021

Stays at home and beats back death, or debt, you decide

(title is lifted from Ben Folds "Where's Summer B")

We have a nice amount of money in our checking account for the first time in our entire relationship. For a lot of people, it is not a lot of money, I'm sure. But for us, it is pretty great. 

Since the pandemic came, we haven't traveled. We haven't had fun. We (ahem, I) have not bought concert tickets, paid for hotel rooms, dinners, bought all the drinks at the bar for 20 friends in NYC (yes I did, annnnnnnnnd it was expensive), not for a good long damn while. Not being a drunken octopus (which is my sister's nickname) helps not spend your money. 

While having zero fun is a down right drag, it's nice to have some cash.

Sidebar story: I had a dream recently where Doug and I went look at a condo that we were going to be renting, and the husband in the couple was Doug's boss (not in real life now currently for real). 

It was on a pier in a super hip and active seaside town. Maybe like Astoria, Oregon or something. The building had four units, it was humongous, and used to be a warehouse or cannery or something. It had been rehabbed to the studs, soundproof/weatherproof/waterproof giant windows with shades inside the window that you could move up or down.  Rough, worn wooden wide pine floors that were completely refinished, rehabbed, sealed and shiny. Exposed brick, rusty beams and pulleys for doors to rooms and pantry enclosures, but they glided silently and perfectly. Bookstore style floor to ceiling (12 ft) shelving with a ladder that glided along just like the doors. It had amazing skylights, and a beautiful gourmet kitchen with indoor gas grill, huge patio off the back on the second floor. It was very exciting and beautiful and everything I'd love to have in a place to live on the ocean.

We were signing the paperwork and the wife said "okay go in there and start boxing up our things, and you'll be moving the couch to the elevator and ..." She was giving us orders like we were the moving company. 

I looked at Doug and said "wait a second, we have to do the move too? Don't they have enough money to hire movers? We are hiring movers? Why aren't they hiring movers?" 

She heard me and turned around and said "oh honey, how do you think I got rich? It wasn't by paying for moving companies to move my things! Now go over here and wrap all these dishes. You can do the kitchen." 

How do you think I got rich. Huh. 

By not spending any money at all, being frugal, and sitting on anything you have. No buying rounds for all the friends at the NYC bar after a Guster rain out. 

So this past year, I guess that's been us. Only we did pay movers, but I packed our stuff.  (Still would have loved to move into this imaginary wharf warehouse thing. I think about the place often. Maybe it exists. It was that real in my dream. Well. Maybe someday). Sidebar story complete

Looking at our bank balances, it is nice to know we can afford to get some of the things we really need to upgrade. 

We need:

  • A nice new sofa/sectional situation in the living room. We got a free Ikea couch from a co-worker when we bought his bed (also Ikea) when he moved to Spain. No one wanted the couch so he told us to just take it. I insisted on giving him money. It's the nicest couch we've ever had.
  • A patio set instead of just camp chairs and a weird little wicker table thing Doug found while out for a walk when we lived in Massachusetts. It was in someone's trash.  But my patio dreams may have to wait until after the invasion of the Cicadas.  More on that later, I'm sure.
  • A new bed. Our box spring/platform sucks and we've slept the hell out of this Tempurpedic over the last 20 +years. I would kind of like a king sized bed, but we should stick with a queen because the chances are it'll fit into more bedrooms in the future. But a king would fit into my fantasy condo.
  • Other stuff and junk to make Chrissie happy. I have a stack of things to frame, I need pants.You know. The usual day-to-day living things.
  • eventual travel maybe. Someday.
We have one credit card. 

We have had this solitary soldier for years. Right around the time we were about to lose the house, I rolled everything into this one particular credit card after trying to get rates lowered on like 3 others that we had. And they refused.  So I called this bank, asked if they could raise our limit, told them my plan to consolidate all my debt onto one card, and they gave me a really high credit limit in case I had to spend some money. They lowered my interest rate, and let me do what I felt I needed to do. 

I said kiss my ass to CitiBank, Discover, a BOA card, paid off those balances with the transfer from this bank, and started a journey to just pay shit off. That was 2008. I thought it was going to go much faster, but things happened, setbacks occured, and we did our best.

I had gotten it down to about 9k in 2017. I was on track to pay it all off, right up until Doug got laid off from his first job down here. We slowly ran that up again. Not all the way to the limit, but it was used. 

Gotta buy groceries, put gas in the car, feed that boy...all that happy horseshit. 

After his layoff, he worked for a while doing healthcare record audits, so they sent him all over the place. The only problem with that job was he had to buy all of his tickets, hotel, everything on his own dime and then get reimbursed. Doug would get his reimbursement for the trip, book the next trip with the card, we'd keep the money it in the Checking account for groceries and all that, and pay the minimum due on the credit card. Because the Credit card was the only thing hotels or rental cars would accept, he couldn't use the bank card we'd been using which was attached to our checking account. 

Things were balance and equilibrium, steady on, and then Doug got his job that he has now. Finances started to get better. We'd have 5-7k in the bank at a stretch. Hell yeah. We bought a car with cash, (not a lot -3k) because Doug refuses to get a car loan anywhere. "No bank is going to make a penny of interest off of me" says the man who got financially ruined by A Certain Bank. 

And I have to agree. 

We'd go to Massachusetts or New York. We would comfortably order dinner and not worry. Guster Tickets and the like. And I was happy with 5k in the bank, but realizing if he got laid off again, or if I got laid off, we'd start the cycle all over. 

Then the pandemic came to visit. With no travel, no fun, since December 2019 really, we've just been pulling down money. And we have been a lot healthier financially.

I have been throwing 800 bucks a month at that one credit card (minimum payment expected? 350.00.... ) this last year. We are back down to about 8,000 bucks, and today while I was looking at the account and setting up the online payment, I said "why the hell should I take 10 months plus probably another month with the (relatively small) interest charges to finish paying this off? I should just do it." 

I pointed this out to Doug and he agreed. Just do it. 

It felt wild to do, but, I paid it off almost in full. The system wouldn't let me pay 100% of the balance because math and computers and weekends and stuff. The payment will go through probably Monday, and then I can then pay it off in full the following day. 

And for the first time since about 1987 when I got my first credit card through BayBank in college (and I bought a scarf and an , I will have no credit card debt at all. Read that again. None. Zilch. Nada. Zero. Done. 

That 800 a month I've been throwing there I can shift into a savings account. I can just let it all pile up like Daffy Duck and I can scream I'm rich! I'm comfortably well off! 



I'll be reaching out to my local bank to set up that savings account next week. 

It's a nice feeling to not have to think about this like I have had to for so long. 

"You smell like piña coladas, and you are very green"

Doug went out to mow our lawn this morning. It should have been done sometime during the week but he let it go. Work was busy. He had to go into the office on Thursday (gasp) and we just both were straight out. In fact, I'm working, it's 4:45 on Saturday, and I'm taking a break. 

To share this with you.

The dog went out with him. He's very good in the yard and does not get in the way when Doug is mowing. After about a half hour of mowing the lawn, with stops and starts because the grass was long and thick and wet ("juicy" as he called it) I heard a knock on the door. Why the hell is he knocking on the door?

I opened it and he had a big grin on his face. 

"You need to get your camera, and come see your dog." 

So I did. And here is what I saw. 





Oh Dear. 

The dog is green. 

Mind you, I've never had a mostly white dog. I've always had mostly black dogs, and dogs that weren't super crazy about rolling in the grass. They would a little, but mostly, no. They just chilled. 

Phineas loves to roll in the grass. He goes out every morning, and rolls in the grass. We go for walks and he finds a bit of grass to flop over in, and roll about. At first I was worried he was finding poop or dead remnants to roll in and get it on him in order to get the smelly smell of something that smells smelly onto his person, but no. He just likes it. I guess you gotta like something.

Doug was too busy mowing to notice the changes in color as he saw him rolling about. 

We made some jokes about "It's not easy being green," and Doug said "you wouldn't like him when he gets angry," an homage to the Hulk. We tried to make bark and hulk work together but they didn't quite go. 

A little after our discovery of St. Phineas Green of the Freshly Mown Fields, we were expecting someone to come over and pick up our snow blower. We had moved it here from Massachusetts, and we have never used it. It does not fit in the shed. Doug just wanted to give it away. We didn't want to sell it because we didn't want someone haggling with us and giving us a hard time over things. So I put it on NextDoor.com and had 5 volunteers who wanted a free snowthrower that we couldn't guarantee would work since we hadn't started it for 2 winters. We started it the first winter to make sure it ran, but ... eh? It may not anymore. 

Dude's name was Grant and he was a riot. He saw the dog and had to take a selfie to show his kids. We had a great talk, he's about our age, retired military. He is from Oklahoma, and has been here 10 years with his family. We had a lot of fun talking about snow. And he said that if he gets the Barfer up and roaring, and we get slammed with snow, he'll come on by and rescue us. How nice. 

Doug finished mowing the lawn, and came in. We looked at the dog. And we were pretty convinced we'd have to give him a bath because this was not just going to wear off anytime soon. 

His former owner said he hates baths, so she would always smear peanut butter on the wall to keep him still. We talked about the tub, but we don't have a shower head that you can pull down and bring close like we did at the last house. It made giving Brodie a bath so easy. On top of that, I had just cleaned the bathroom on Friday, so of course the universe was setting me up for a laugh.  

Nice clean bathroom. Now let's wash a dog in it. 

"We can try the utility sink downstairs?" Doug suggested. I thought it sounded good - we wouldn't have to bend over, and could plug the sink to get some water surrounding him while we dumped more on him.

Overall the process was a success. Geoff gave him cookies to get him to sit still while Doug and I wet, soaped, rinsed, and rinsed, and rinsed him.

We sang the piña colada song (in the title with our new lyrics) because the dog shampoo we had was coconut (and oatmeal) so it smelled nice. And we sang that it wasn't easy being green. 

Time to towel dry, and he got out and shook everywhere over and over and over. It was hysterical. So I had to mop the basement. Thank you doggo. 

Glad we didn't try this in the bathroom. 

He's still wet, 3 hours later. He was on his doggie bed and I covered him up to warm him, but he didn't seem to like being wrapped in a warm towel. It's just about his dinner time. So now that he's been through all that trauma, we'll feed him and love on him, and hopefully he won't go right out later and roll in the grass, again. 

Or he'll just have to stay green for a while. 

The poor traumatized thing.



Tuesday, April 13, 2021

Phineas and the Panic

 This could be the name of my new band. 

While we were out of town, Geoff was here with Phin. Phin is always exceptionally upset when someone leaves, I can see why his former owner felt it was unfair to him to leave him alone for 12-14 hours a day. 

Well, he's grown firmly attached to us. Probably a combination of hating to be left out of the going outside part of things, and the actual separation anxiety, Geoff said he went bananas for about a half hour after we left. Saturday night, he was confused as to why we weren't there to go to bed and cried a lot, so Geoff slept on the couch, the dog bed being right by the coffee table. 

Sunday, Phineas spent the day with Geoff down in the basement. Geoff moves from his bedroom to my desk through the day, studying at the big desk and using his computer in his room. Phin slept on the bed with him Sunday night. 

Please note, we've never had a dog who has slept with him. He has longed for this his whole life. None of the dogs wanted to sleep with the children - they want to sleep where Doug or I are because they know we are the "pack leaders" as it were, and the kids are always just puppies like them. I think Geoff was completely overjoyed by this.

Geoff then realized on Monday morning, he had class from 8-9:30 and then lab from noon to 2. So Phineas would be completely alone here for the first time ever. 

He pondered that maybe, well, Phin might get a little bit wild.

His realization was pretty accurate. 

Geoff got home at 3pm, and Phin had swept a bunch of paperwork off the dining table and coffee table, and he also jumped up to look out the window where we have a shelf for the microwave, and destroyed 3 boxes of tea in our large tea box outright. He also got into his own dog treats, which were sitting up on a bench by the front door. Geoff said there was plastic everywhere, and Phin had eaten about a full bag of wee oyster cracker sized treats, and 10 fake pigs ears, ones that we limit giving him due to the farts they produce. Vegetarian pig's ears. But damn if he doesn't love them. (By the way, the farting last night was extra horrible last night).

Geoff cleaned up the best he could (not the best at cleaning tbh) and Phineas was exceptionally happy to see him, and shadowed him the rest of the day. 

We got home and his sense of relief at us being here was palpable. 

This morning he woke me up at about 5 to go outside. I think is tummy may not be feeling quite right. I fed him, an hour earlier than usual and when I got up at 9 half the food was still there. The poor weirdo. 

I'm trying to think about what we can do (other than really put all the things away before leaving the house) for the times ahead where (maybe) all of us will be out of the house at the same time. There has always been at least one human here. Possibly a very very large dog crate? I just don't know how fair that is to him. doggie gates across places? Still pondering what will be the best for his needs, but also not make him feel trapped or punished. 

Open to suggestions.

Get Away - Skyline and Charlottesville


Yes we're still in a pandemic. And yes, I feel like shit doing any sort of anything outside the house. 

But what's the difference in going to the grocery store, and going to a restaurant. The grocery store people don't seem to socially distance. I don't see any evidence of cleaning after people go down the aisles anymore. 

Restaurants at least, well, they're still making a great effort. And supporting them to keep them open, I think I'm all about it.

Plus, I had the covid. I'll go out, still mask up, and act like this is somewhat more safe than going to Target. And Doug is feeling very well emboldened by the fact we've already had it, and is pissed off that the CDC isn't announcing or deciding or saying that it's okay. No one seems to have a solid answer to whether or not it's ok, so he's making his own decisions, I'm kind of going along for the ride. 

Oh, it's been 3 months, you can go back to not worrying. Oh you have to get a vaccine but no don't get a vaccine. Oh six people died from one vaccine so everyone stop getting a vaccine. Oh, yeah. Even if you get a vaccine, you're not safe but just keep social distancing and masking and handwashing. 

He's kind of like "what's the point in doing anything?" He's been a tiger in a bottle for a few weeks and it has been tough to handle. 

And unlike a lot of my friends who are flying to Barbados, or going to Puerto Rico, or drunk ass flat out on the beaches of Florida or Texas... we've kept a low profile and inside. 


Over the weekend we drove down to Skyline Drive in Shenandoah National Park. 

We started in the middle at Thornton Gap instead of the Front Royal location, because it's a long long drive. We have done the whole thing in the past, and it is exhausting. There are just so many waysides and pull-outs you can swing into, gawk, and move along out of to the next one. 

Our goal was Charlottesville, where we stayed for our anniversary weekend a couple years ago. 

Doug picked a hotel with limited bookings and no daily housekeeping (thank you, we appreciate that). You could get towels and shampoo at the main desk if you need refills of things. I like having a made up bed when I come back from doing a toodleaboot town, but this was fine. We put our towels up on the shower rail. We used them again (I usually do that anyway but Doug is more cavalier about it. "I'm in a hotel, I demand a clean towel!" Okay dude). 

We got checked in, got ready and ventured out to find somewhere to eat on the pedestrian mall. Downtown Charlottesville successfully converted the area to a walkers/eaters/drinkers/visitors paradise, people were seated in outdoor cafes with tables spread apart, plenty of dog walkers and bachelorette parties out painting the town. Everyone had a mask on. People were using the free hand sanitizer stations. 

It started to rain, and a woman had told me we should just go back to our hotel and eat at the restaurant there because it was a 2 hour wait everywhere. People were huddled in doorways next to the restaurant doors, hoping to get inside. 

We walked by a place called Miller's and there was no one on the patio in the mall, 2 tables by the door and both were taken. 10 people came out of the door so we knew this was our lucky day. Doug asked if there was a long wait for 2, and they said they could get us in immediately. A group by the door was a party of 8, so they were waiting for the other setup that had just cleared out. We got seated before them. 

It was a lovely little bar with great late night food and craft cocktails. The waitress was delightful, and we had a wonderful time watching people from our perch in the window as the rain came down and sent those drunken bachelorettes scurrying down the street in their sashes and high heels. 

Sunday morning Doug wanted to walk about the mall again, the weather was perfect. Low 70s, no humidity, and there were tons of people. We kept our distance from everyone, visited 2 bookstores that had basically only us, another patron, and the person working inside. I had been looking for a purse that was just a little longer than the one I currently use, with some compartments for separation. Or a new wallet, since the one I've been using for years broke the zipper. 

We stopped into a fair trade store, and Doug spotted a cute bag on the wall that fit the bill, made in India. A front section for the cards. Middle section for breath mints and lip balm. 2 main sections with one zipper, for the phone and a spare battery and cord, and a back section for whatever else. Turns out it was the perfect size for my little container of hand sanitizing wipes. Hot damn. It fit it all. Score. 

Another bookstore, walk around an art park north of the mall, and then walk down to the IX Art Park south of town. 



Doug's sights were set on the North American Sake Brewery,  which had not yet opened to the public last time we were in town. It is a cool little space, hardly anyone was there, again - a feature for us because I don't want to be around people. The staff were amazing. The food was good. 

The Sake? well. I'm no expert. We each got a flight and two of them were not very good in our opinions, but reminding everyone - we know shit about sake. I found them medicinal and not very drinkable. The other two were much better, and my favorite was the one named Moon Leap, which was almost like a champagne. It was light and effervescent. Absolutely lovely. Doug liked one called Serenity Now, which he also got a glass of. 

They were out of their 2 most popular brews, and the host who was chatting with us went and found a small tasting bottle of their very most popular - Big Baby. I think if they had not been out of that, we probably would have had it as a glass too. It was really good. We ate rice bowls, chilled with the host (I wish I could remember their name), talked about process and traditions, what Americans think Sake is, what our experience has been up to this point with it (limited) and had a really relaxing time there. I won't say we're "into" it, like wow, I'm totally into Sake and only drink Sake and now I have glasses and books and ritual about Sake. But it was a great time. Glad to be there and have the place to ourselves pretty much. Lots of take-out orders happening for the food, so that was nice to see on a Sunday afternoon. 

We skipped visiting Three Notch'd Brewing because we'd been there before, and, the patio was incredibly crowded so we didn't want to enter into that scene. We headed back to the hotel for post-sake naps.

For dinner we walked over to Monsoon Siam for Thai food. Again, very crowded patio but we saw three tables open up and they got us seated quickly. Service was very slow, they were pretty slammed, but the night was gorgeous and it was nice to sit and relax and just watch traffic and dog walkers and overhear conversations all around us. We were tucked into a back corner, which was somewhat unfortunate because we were a little bit overlooked by our server. Had he come by once or twice more I would have had a couple more cocktails while waiting. That's money, yo. Always look at the empty glasses on the table when you're the server. 

The food was outstanding and well worth the wait. And we did share a slice of Mango Cheesecake, with a blackberry compote across the top. Damn. So good. 

Monday morning we left for Monticello. Found out I've been saying it wrong all these years. 

There were too many rules, which I think Thomas Jefferson would flip the fuck out over. I wasn't allowed to bring my new, small, compact purse with me up the mountain to the house (it was TOO BIG) and the whole rigamarole of their schtick was just annoying as hell. It was beautiful though, and we did a self guided tour with the phones and avoided all other humans. The gardens were just coming to life, and they have a huge expanse of plantings, so many types of lettuce and carrots, potatoes and berries. And there was this adorable little brick shed at the edge of the center, which we hung out in and had a wonderful chat with the docent there. She was a hot ticket, and we called the little space Mr. Jefferson's Slacking Shed. I think that was my favorite spot. 

The woman we'd been chatting with encouraged us to be sure to walk to the back of the house for the ... "Money Shot." Doug wasn't sure what she meant and then realized it is the view on the nickel. Literally, had us laughing our asses off there for a couple of minutes as we realized she didn't mean Money Shot like... porn. Here it is. Laugh with me. 


On the way back down the mountain, we went to Carter Mountain Orchard where there was a tasting room for Bold Rock Cider. Doug had one of their ciders at Miller's and the girl told us we could go to Nellysville, VA to check them out if we felt so inclined. Doug found this a better option, since it was right on the road from Monticello. If you go to the website I linked to and look at that picture, that is so Before Times, and it makes me anxious just looking at it. 

We had that entire area to ourselves. In fact, that area is below where were sitting. There's a whole other terrace. This space can hold hundreds of people, and it was literally just us, some cider, some Apple Cider donuts from the farm store, and a beautiful view down the valley to Charlottesville. 



The drive home was long - the choices to get back up to DC are to drive East towards Richmond, or take the country roads due north eventually getting to like Warrenton and the highway to DC. We decided to take the backroads. Beautiful ride, lots of flowering trees and horse farms, and actually 20 minutes faster than if we'd headed further East to go North. 

I took today off and should be working on Aaron's website transfer. He started advertising on the local NPR station in Astoria, OR and discovered the phone number is wrong on his current website. So last night I managed to change all the references to the number, one of them was especially challenging because it was hidden  in a field I could not get to. Doh. So at 11pm I got someone I know to help me out, we got that last field ironed out. Huzzah. 

Now to figure out launching the site I built for him and get off of the first site. The dude who built it is not very supportive. Or kind. And Aaron's about to kick his ass, so best to get it done quickly. And he's impressed at how many people emailed him to let him know the phone number was wrong. 

Underwriting on NPR seems to work, eh? He was spending time answering the emails and semi-overwhelmed with the response. 

Anyway. Glad I have today off and am not thinking of work or anything. It's nice. Better get to Aaron's site and get that rocking. 

Tuesday, April 06, 2021

4, 3, 2, 1 - Guster Day and Easter Weekend

 So that won't come around on the calendar again, April 3, 2021, 4/3/21, or 4, 3, 2, 1 when out the barrel of a gun... a nice Guster reference on your calendar!


Enjoy. This is an old version from Guster on Ice, but it's better quality than a lot of the fan videos that come up on youtube when you search.  Never has a song about wet dreams been such a great radio hit! 

We have had a quiet few weeks. Went and got that hutch and then nothing really big has been going on. Work has been very busy for both of us. 

Geoff received his clinical placement at a hospital in DC, so on Saturday we took a drive down to scope out the joint and get an idea about where the office was located. He has to be there at 7am on June 1, and is anxious because you cannot see the office/location from the street - it is somewhere in the depths of the hospital complex. We assured him that it would be okay and day-of he'd probably get help from someone at the front desk to let him know where to go. After 2 years of pre-requisite and course work, now we get to the nitty gritty, an actual hospital placement. 

Wish him luck, continue to send him good vibes, academically he is doing really well but this is where his weaknesses (if you can call them that) show - in person interactions. Hopefully things will go well. My heart is supportive and fingers crossed. 

Easter was spent puttering around the yard, sitting outside in the sun, enjoying the day, doing a little more unpacking, and just generally taking it easy. Doug bought a grill a few weeks back so "Grillmaster 5000" planned out a wonderful standing rib roast on the grill, with baked potatoes, and veggies, and everything. Two hours with indirect heat after a 20 minute high temp sear, it came out amazing. Absolutely amazing. We sat at the dining table, which I finally got cleared off after having boxes and stuff all over it for weeks, had wonderful conversation, and it was a truly pleasant time. The only thing missing, again, another holiday's worth of Jess. 

We gave Phineas one of the rib bones and he went to town on it - absolutely and thoroughly. Living his best life for 2 days. He got it stuck under the liquor cabinet at one point and was very sad until I figured out what he needed. 

Last night, he threw up repeatedly. Small bits of bone that he'd broken off of the rib after cleaning it completely. I went and found the big piece left in the livingroom, still a lot of rib there, and threw it away, cleaned up his puke, went outside with him, three times. Today he's sleeping like a champ. I'm glad he gets to do that but sad that I cannot. 

Actually nothing says I can't, I guess? 

That's about all. Nothing super exciting. Feeling tired and drained and just would rather not work but continue to unpack and organize. As Doug says, "it'll all come together in time." 

Guess so.