I did jump on trampolines but I didn't do any tricks or anything. I had this mental block that prevented me from letting certain things happen.
This happens to me where I think "yeah, I can totally do that" and then I get to the point where it has to happen and then... I can't. I simply cannot do it. This was the case last year when I had to give myself shots when I had the DVT. My doctor demonstrated it to me like it was nothing, I had dozens of friends who have to give themselves shots all the time say "oh yeah, it's nothing you can do that." I felt confident, put the needle in my hand and held it to my side and just couldn't do it. Doug had to give them to me, because I just could NOT GET PAST the putting the needle into my body.
The same thing happened to me at the trampoline place. I can jump, stop myself from jumping, but can't do the sit-bounce move because I can't get over the fact that I am falling down.
All our lives, we work rather hard to stay upright. Not fall down. Falling Down HURTS. So why would I want to deliberately shoot my legs out from under me and land on my ass? That shit's gonna hurt. Right?
I know, I know, I'm not landing on solid ground. I'm landing on a mesh surface with springs attached that is going to sproing me back upwards and I'll put my feet back UNDER ME and stand up again.
I can do this if I jump into WATER. It is nothing. I know, I can shoot my legs straight out in front of me and land on my butt and it is called a cannonball. I've done it a billion times, maybe a billion and a third. Yeah. But...
I totally could not do it on the trampoline. One of the kids, Kevin, totally tried to coach me in doing it. But there was just this thing, this "OH SHIT I'MMA GONNA FALL DOWN AN'DIEEEEEEE" thought that was going through my head. As I stood there in a room surrounded by 24 other people who literally were doing this as easily as if it were breathing.
There were long stretches of me just jumping up and down, swinging my arms, enjoying myself, and then I would psych myself up for it and .... No.
This has been said a thousand times by me here and elsewhere, but I love our Boy Scout Troop. I love that they love Geoff. I love the friends I have in both the dads and moms involved in the troop.
And I totally love the kids. The newer kids I'm still getting to know, and going on these trips gives me an opportunity to talk to them and get to know them. One little boy, Ryan, was running all over the joint having a blast. He came over to the area where the coach was teaching people how to do flips in a tethered harness, and I asked him if he was having a good time. He nodded yes, and smiled. "No you're not." I said. And he looked and me and said "Oh, yes, I really am. I'm having a good time."
"I don't believe you." I said, smirking.
Now all the other boys know that this is my M.O. but he doesn't really know me well. So I had to look at him and tell him I was joking. He eventually got it. When we left I asked him if he had fun, and he said "No, not one bit."
Atta'boy.
So I have no pictures of me jumping, thank God. You don't need to see that. Me in all my fatness airborne. But I have a ton of pictures and some video of the kids in action. It was hard to take pictures inside. Even with the flash on, most of the pictures came out blurry. Only a few were truly awesome, and I think that is when the guys seemed to hang in the air for a few seconds, weightless and joyful.
Another observation is that my son has the most rock and roll hair ever. It's been close to a year since his last haircut, which is driving his father mad, but I love it. Video of Geoff rocking out on the trampoline, with apologies for the slight butt-crack visible (and me laughing) due to the fact his shorts are too big. All the pictures are over on Flickr if you want to go see. Enjoy.
I think a lot of things like this are motivated by what you have to do, or what you don't. eg, I *had* to learn to give myself shots. the other alternatives were: 1.) get rid of the cats or 2.) drive two hours every week, plus gas and tolls an time in the waiting room. giving myself shots was better than those other two options. you don't do tricky, flippy things because you don't have to. there's no imperative. if you had a job that required you to do tricky, flippy things or you'd get fired (like, if you were in Cirque du Soleil, which I encourage!), you'd do it. my friend Pam says she "can't drive in the dark", but that's because she has a husband to drive her and the kids anywhere when they need to. necessity is the mother of invention and the hurdler of fears!
ReplyDelete