The Thanks Post for 2020

We had Thanksgiving, here in the USA. 

2020 has been a weird year. This year I knew Jess was not coming down to hang with us (I am pretty sure in 28 years, this is the first Thanksgiving we've ever had not as a foursome). 

Doug invited his aunt and cousin to join us even though I didn't want anyone in our house. I wanted it to just be us. If Jess couldn't be here, well then no one can be here. 

He felt it was alright. So they came. We had a lovely dinner. I did all our shopping super far in advance and the turkey was pre-brined which I didn't read on the label. It was probably the best turkey we've ever had. 

I took Doug's aunt on a short walk because she's got some vein and circulation issues that cause her to need a walk. Two blocks and that was far enough for her. She's 80, so I was proud of her for getting where we did, and she thanked me for dragging her out. It made me feel like I'm some sort of athletic rock star here, just to bring her safely up to our little free library (and Pokestop!) and around the block. I told her it was all downhill back to the house. She was very relieved and said it was the longest walk she's had in a while. She usually walks around the dining room. I encouraged her to get a fitbit or something, and see how many steps it is around the block. Or up to the corner and back. And then break that each day by 10 steps. Seeing as I don't even like to go outside anymore, I'm not exactly the one to take advice from. 

But she seemed really happy for me to give her that encouragement.

The Day After Thanksgiving was pie for breakfast day. 

Pictured is a mess pile of my sour cream apple pie and my coffee with whipped cream and cinnamon and cocoa powder on top. 

It doesn't count for sugar, carbs, whatever. It's the day after Thanksgiving. And I didn't have a slice the night before so it's all good. We're good. 

Sour cream apple pie is actually a pretty bomb ass thing to make. Freaking delicious. 

We took a long walk yesterday. Doug wanted to "walk off the sugar" and made me and Geoff get in the car to take a walk at the C&O Canal. The parking areas we usually go to were closed and filled with construction vehicles so we drove further towards the city and ended up at a spot at the intersection of Clara Barton and Chain Bridge. It was a good place to park, and while there were a lot of people on the tow path, we went off the path an into the woods to walk closer to the Potomac. 

We sat by the river and enjoyed the spot. I've driven above here a million times on the GW Parkway, that's in the picture above, where the sun is about to come down on the overpass. I always wondered how to get down here, and now I know. 

We met some good dogs.

It was a 3 mile round trip walk. Felt good and we had a lot of fun.

Today was another beautiful day but I mostly hovered indoors. My house is so nice and clean from having company that I'm greatly enjoying being up in here. 

We are starting to think about our move, looking at listings and things and starting to think about life. I still have books I was thinking of unpacking but those are going to stay put. 

Happy to be here and dreading the move deeply. I am tempted to contact my property manager and say "are they really sure they want to sell? I mean, reallllllyyyyy?" 

I know I am feeling selfish. But I'm happy. I'm here and settled and looking around my living room and my plants, and my books and just feeling like I don't want to let this go. 

Not yet. 

I'm thankful for this spot. This neighborhood and the people we've gotten to know. For Pat and Tony & Betsy. For the Pokestop up the street that gets me out most days just to hit the spinner. For the closeness of the Metro that I have not ridden since March, but knowing it is there. For how easy it is for Geoff to get to classes when he needs to get to classes in person. For the ease of access to the Beltway, even if the Beltway is a shit show most days. For how I only have a few miles if I want to drive into DC, to my office or to anywhere else. 

I'm happy here. I'm not in love with here. But this building and the surrounding area, I'm cool with it. Very cool. Content. And that's half the battle in being thankful. To recognize what brings you calm and comfort. It isn't perfect but it is good. It is better than all the alternatives. It is safe. I'm safe. 

And for all of that, I'm truly thankful. 

Sleepy Bitch Disease

 Jess tweeted that they needed to have a COVID test, someone at their brand new job had the 'rona. They got called on Saturday and learned they needed to go in and get tested. 

No biggie - Geoff has been tested twice, if someone who has been in the same building with you has it, you go get tested.

Later on, they posted "Bad news, tested positive for sleepy bitch disease." 

Which.

I interpreted as tested positive for Covid-19.  Because Jess would, of course, call it something like sleepy bitch disease. 

Jess didn't post anything else, nothing. So I thought oh shit - they are not feeling well. I sat here worrying. So today I couldn't stand it any longer, and I called and asked what happens next. Are you feeling okay? Do you want to get retested? Can you call Dr. E (our family practitioner) and get tested? Do you need anything. What are Liz & Ashleigh going to do - they are supposed to be headed back from their Thanksgiving retreat to Ohio. Can they come in the apartment? Do they have to go somewhere else? Oh my God, do you need anything I can have 10 people at the back porch with groceries and mom-level care within the hour. 

"Mah," says Jess. I tested positive for sleepy bitch disease, not covid." 

"Oh," I pondered, "so....that's just normal you. Sleepy Bitch, okay I get it. You've had terminal sleepy bitch disease your whole life." 

"Exactly."

They laughed hysterically at me. Deservedly so. The fact I'd read "sleepy bitch disease" as Covid. Of course. Of course, your mom is going to read that as you got the 'rona. Because people are sleepy. They don't feel good. All the time. Yes. Okay. 

We laughed, they were thankful that I was worried and concerned. Jess' insurance doesn't kick in until the end of January, so right now they are waiting for the bridge of Mass Health to kick in on December 1st  (this is a new job they started at the end of October) so I was worried about expenses. Paying for treatment if treatment is needed. No need to worry. Test is covered by her company. No worries for the most part. Most likely 99.999% not the Rona. 

Jess had talked to their manager (who, by they way, was at the same testing station they were at on Saturday).  The manager said that if they don't have each of their results tonight, they don't have to go to work tomorrow and won't have to eat a vacation or sick day, which is good since Jess has only earned one vacation day so far and it would suck to give it up because they don't have test results. 

We had a fun chat. I was quite relieved to know that sleepy bitch disease is not the same as Coronavirus. The only thing Jess has is a terminal case of sarcasm. 

Jess' friend Molly has the 'rona, so I dropped her a line today. I'm momming all over that, worried about my girl there and always concerned about the children even when I can't be right there to help. 

Not much else is going on - I have some boob news but will save that for a non-Sleepy Bitch Disease update. 

My boss is on furlough next week, which sucks because I can't even reach out to him to ask a question. Furlough is the worst. It isn't like on Vacation where if I feel I am justified I can ask and he'd be kind enough to give me a reply. 

Furlough is like he's dead to me. And there is a lot he does that I don't know how to do. So tomorrow morning I'm in need of stuff he normally would have done for meetings, and I'm lost. Luckily we have a colleague in another department who knows how to do the things he does, so I'm going to ask for a little guidance and tet myself looking like I know what I'm doing. 

That's about the update from here.

The Delmarva

We live far from the ocean. I don't think in my heart of hearts I truly appreciated where I lived, until I couldn't drive 15 minutes, grab a coffee, and go park at the beach. "Oh, but you live near the Potomac River, certainly there are nice places to go to hang out there?" Some people have said to me.

Meh. Not really. Not places that I feel are my style, or affordable. 

It takes about a half hour, maybe a little more, just to get to Annapolis from here. Which isn't the ocean, but it is a lot like Newburyport and I like it. It's a good place to visit.

I often suggest we take little trips over to Annapolis, and Doug will "meh" it off. Traffic, too many people, nowhere to park, etc etc. And now in the pandemic times, too many people is not the kind of thing either of us want to deal with. 

So we head west into the mountains instead, where the state and national parks have a lot more space. I like the mountains and all. So it's nice to go there. But. It isn't the ocean. And I do miss the ocean.

We were supposed to take a trip to Williamsburg, VA on Saturday for my birthday, but I wasn't in the mood. Pandemic. We should stay home. We shouldn't be going places. And, after the boob prodding, my body is sore, and I'm a little bit cranky, and I just didn't want to do. 

Doug had also looked at things to do and places to stay, and Williamsburg was looking pretty underwhelming. A lot of restaurants are closed, the tourist things that one would like to do are kind of not open. I had wanted to go see my friend who is now working at William and Mary, but then again, I wasn't feeling very social. I would want to have a visit in better spirits. 

This pandemic, yo. This pandemic. Got me feeling beat. My turn to Meh.

Doug suggested a day trip over to the ocean, because he pays attention to things that might make me happier, or at least happy. 

I thought we'd be going to Annapolis or maybe just over the bridge to the direct other side of the bay. 

We'd been to Easton and St. Michaels, and to Cambridge, and down to Salisbury.  That always seemed like the farthest I'd want to go for a day trip. 

But that isn't the ocean, he says. That's the Chesapeake Bay. He meant the ocean. He meant Ocean City, MD. 

"Dude, that is far," was my reply. 

"Yeah, but this is the time to go! It's going to be a beautiful day, it is off season, so hopefully not a lot of people will be there, and it's the ocean." And it is only a little further east than Salisbury so. 

Okay. I guess.

We got up early (for us) had coffee, and were out the door at 9:30, made it there after noon. 

The parking lot at the south end of town was sparsely occupied. Not sure where to start, we sat and looked at the inlet and the jetty across the way, enjoying the light on the water. 

We walked up into the Boardwalk area, admired the roller coaster and the ferris wheel, both still and silent. 

Some places were open, it had a feel of off-season and not pandemic times. 

People seem to really like the French Fry vendors and the lines were long. Lots of your usual T-shirts and sassy tourist things, half of them open, half closed. I can just imagine some girl named Becky coming home with that face piercing, but no this time of year. We passed on getting me some soft serve ice cream, but let it be known I'm happy to know there is soft serve to be found, seeing as there isn't any near where we live. 

Beachfront inns and hotels on the boardwalk were mostly closed, a couple of people were in the condos overlooking the beach, smoking on their balconies and people watching. In my head I was wondering if those were air b&b rentals of if they own them, and actually live there year round or on weekends or something. I had a twinge of envy looking out onto the beach and knowing that sunrises are probably spectacular.

We walked up a ways, playing pokemon and just enjoying the day. We found a place to have lunch but they had a very limited menu. Two cocktails and some wings, and our turn to people watch while sitting out socially distanced on the patio. 

Lots of dogs, perfectly still ocean, no waves. Metal detectorists looking for that treasure, dude bros throwing the football, some with their shirts off, children climbing all over the walls and the play sculptures along the sand. 

It was gorgeous. I really wanted for us to be staying in a hotel and not have to budge, and just walk further up the boardwalk to continue this kind of relaxing time. But I knew we'd be having to drive home, and it gets dark early these days.

Ocean City comes across as a far less desperate boardwalk than Atlantic City. There were wonderful restaurant patios everywhere, most closed, so I could imagine an early summer day here. 

Atlantic City doesn't have all this boardwalk eatery action because they want your ass in the casinos. But this is the place to be. Relaxed, eating, drinking, and just looking at those two gorgeous golden retrievers walking this way.

Hello, ladies. 

On our way back to the car, it seemed more people were coming out to enjoy the end of the day. Saw a lot of kids with soccer or sports shirts from their towns, a lot of local towns not far, so kind of a good thing to do if you live nearby. Wait until off season, and come down and enjoy the end of a warm day on the beach, before it gets too cold and dreary. Lots of families on bikes, lots more dogs. 

And there was a Jeep beach drive, which in theory we could have joined because now we have a Jeep and it can probably drive on the beach. But we just watched and enjoyed.  Probably 50 or so Jeeps, with a police escort. It wasn't dark yet but a few were decked out with lights that made them look like a rolling rave. And one had a Christmas tree on top. 

Bye, Ocean City. See you later. 

When it was time to go, Doug suggested we drive further north, go up to the end to Rehoboth Beach. 

We pulled off a couple times to walk among the dunes, and got to enjoy a really nice sunset behind us, shining on the people with their cars on the beach (always freaks me out when people do this), spaced far apart with fishing poles and children and puppies. 

The only thing missing that I would have loved were bonfires. No one had a bonfire. Not sure if that's against the law or what, but it would have made the scene. 

I didn't take any pictures at Rehoboth, this one is from one of the pull offs between Dewey Beach and Bethany Beach, I think. By the time we got to Rehoboth, the sun was pretty much set, people were still playing on the beach, the boardwalk is different, and it is much more food focused than tourist t-shirt focused. I think if we head back maybe this is the better place to spend a weekend. I really liked it, liked the vibe, liked the beach. I was sad to leave but it was time. 

It was dark. 

Driving from Rehoboth to the west, it's pretty dark. The landscape of Delaware changes fast from beach resort to farmland, and it is dark. Two lane roads, no lights. Farm houses in the distance and the occasional drive-through Christmas light display at a church or a park. It felt like it took forever. I remember once we went to Baltimore from Atlantic City, and had taken the Cape May/Lewes Ferry, and drove through this area, but it was daytime and corn for miles. Night is a whole different thing. 

When we finally got near Denton, it felt like we were starting to kind of get back to civilisation. 

We got gas right before Kent Narrows, and decided to get some dinner since we didn't have a decent lunch. 

Doug pulled off 50 and into an area that is probably completely out of control in the summer. 

We picked the first thing we saw, The Fisherman's Inn. I know my cousin Craig likes a place down there, and will drive over from Baltimore to go hang out, but I couldn't remember the name of it for the life of me (turns out, it is The Jetty, after he texted me back this morning. Duly noted). 

I took this picture for Untappd, the beer check-in app I use, and I liked the glowing fish out of focus in the background. 

We had this entire dining area to ourselves. There is a little train that goes around on a track up above the tables, it is really cute. There was a dad that carried his kid around the restaurant, obviously so mom could eat a meal in peace, and they were following the train as it came around the rooms of the restaurant. I think the little boy had to be about 15 months old at the very most, with his pacifier in his mouth, pointing up at the train when it came through the hole into the room, watching as it came all around. The dad apologized to us, but honey, I have lived this life. You're good, friend. You are good. 

Then they left to walk along under the track into the next area. Wash, rinse, repeat. Eventually they didn't come back in. Mom must have finished dinner. Time to go.

Dinner was great, it was a really nice place to be, a little more expensive than I would have liked to pay but hell, it was my birthday weekend, right? No expense. 

We got home at 9pm. All told a good day trip, and I have all my mental notes for a possible overnight one day in the Future Times when I'll feel more like going and being and participating in the world. If that time comes again to our culture. When we can all enjoy some Shenanigans, in all forms. 

My Boob

Yesterday was my 54rd birthday. Holy shit, I'm 54.

In pure me style, I scheduled myself a breast biopsy ... on my birthday. Of course. Like you do. 

Why? Well. In February, I had a mammogram, there was calcification. They asked me to come back in 60 days, but I wasn't wanting to go into any medical facility during the whole (gestures at everything) pandemic year. 

I finally went back in early November, and there was more calcification. They used terms like "dense" and "thready" and they said they wanted to do a breast biopsy. 

I agreed and made the appointment. They wanted to do it that week, but it's a weird time at work, and asking for time off on short notice isn't kind to the team. I had already planned on taking off my birthday and the day after (my "early birthday") so I decided I'd schedule the appointment for 11/20. 

Unfortunately, they only do them on Tuesdays and Thursdays so it would have to be 11/19, Thursday, my actual birthday. How lovely. Really, it was no big deal to do so. We were not planning anything fun, a trip or anything. The latest rise in COVID-19 cases spoke of us staying put and not going anywhere. Doug did not take any time off, so I figured I may as well just do it. Get it over with. RCJ said I should show up with a sash and a tiara on. It's my birthday. I'm the princess. 

When I checked myself in for the procedure, the girl at the desk said "Can you confirm your name and birthdate, oh wait whaaaaat?!" It was actually delightful.  She was of course reading my birthdate was that day. I laughed and confirmed. 

"Why would you do this to yourself on your birthday? On this blessed day!" 

"I already had a day off, and, I figured it's my birthday so God will be kind to me. Or, if 2020 is going to be peak 2020 and things don't go kindly, I'll have a hell of a story to share." 

I then made her sing happy birthday to me. Which she did.

When I was brought into the procedure room, the doctor, nurse, and radiology tech all noted my birthday. I asked them to sing to me. I then told them they were the masked singer(s) and they thought it was a riot. 

So far, so fun. 

The process was easy enough. They talked me through everything they were doing while I was flat on my belly on a table where my tiny, pathetic, little left breast hung down and they could do their thing. 

"There's going to be a little pressure" says the doctor. I broke into "Under Pressure" by Bowie and Queen, and they cracked up. 

"You should have a sound system in here and people can submit a playlist before they come in to get probed. I could make a really good one." They thought that was a great idea. "We used to have music playing in here, and we should go back to that. It's a good idea!"

Lidocaine, me swearing and apologizing, needle insertion, pushing, picture taking noises, them soft talking, needle moving, more talking. About a half hour later, they were done. My neck and shoulders hurt more than my breast. The nurse spent some time rubbing my neck before I got up off the table. I thanked her and told her that I used to treat myself to a massage at my friend Sue's therapy spa for my birthday (which made me miss Sue and the spa). She said that she was happy to fill that gap. Not the same but the kindness was palpable.

They gave me discharge instructions. Explained that I would be really sore later. Not right away, but later. They weren't kidding. They encouraged me to wear a sports bra to bed. I laughed and said I didn't even really know where any of my regular bras were, I hadn't worn them since March. And for sure I didn't have a sports bra in my possession. I wore a tank top to bed, it was the closest thing I had.

In the middle of the night, after Geoff had finished watching TV and gone to bed, I woke up and everything really hurt. More Tylenol and an ice pack. Doug had gone into the other bedroom at some point, so he wasn't there to hear me complaining and tossing about. 

I fell back asleep around 6am, wishing I had some sleeping pills or something that would have gotten me through the night. I told RCJ this morning that it hurt all the way to my spine, like.... how deep did you folks gotta dig to get a little something something. Ack. 

Doug and I were going to go to Williamsburg tomorrow, spend a night at a nice hotel. But I'm feeling with the uptick in COVID-19 nonsense that I'm not at all interested in being somewhere other than my house, as much as I do really wish I was staying somewhere and enjoying time away. It isn't worth it.

There is a lot of "Covid Thanksgiving instead of Funeral Christmas" stuff floating around on the internet, and I'm all in agreement. Stay home. Be safe. See how things are doing in 4 weeks. Then figure something out. 

And then, go somewhere. Later.

So, while I didn't get to have a nice few days at a hotel, travel somewhere, do something, thinking of our past when we'd go somewhere like Montreal for my birthday, I'm happy to be home and safe. 

Will know more about my boob on Monday I think. And am hoping for that birthday nothingburger, and not the "boy do I have a story to tell about turning 54."

Here's to the nothingburger.