Voof and Woof

I had a 4pm meeting that should have finished in 1/2 hour. At 6pm we were still struggling to get the job done. Thankfully the client I was working with had a great sense of humor about the difficulties. I suggested we roll back the changes on what we were doing, and he insisted we push through. 

I ended up writing his General Manager an email to let her know he was wonderful to work with, and even though this was such a challenge I was so pleased to work with him. 

A lot of other people may have flipped out, or given up. And I felt he deserved some praise. 

Geoff went to the gym at 7 and didn't get back until after 8. Our other car is still covered in snow, I am going to ask the boy to clean it off tomorrow morning, so I don't have to be held hostage while he's out. I could have gone to the gym. I was in the mood. But no. By 9pm there's no desire to go. And, it started to snow right when he got home. So I was not interested in being on the roads around here even with flurries. 

Doug called his mom tonight and we talked to her for like 90 minutes. She had a lot to chat about. Weather, football, some lady she knows who's husband died, how she'd like to travel but she can't carry her suitcase. Asking about the kids. All that stuff. And she wanted to know all about how our Christmas went with Doug's aunt and cousin. 

The dogs had a super good day. 

Last night Doug woke up at some point, went to the guest room and he closed our bedroom door. Dahlia woke up and was anxious because he wasn't there. I think she is getting very attached to him. I tried to coax her back up into bed but she wasn't interested. I got up to open the door to let her out, 

In her frantic state she threw up, thankfully on the dog bed that no dogs use. I cleaned up, both dogs went to the bed with Doug. This morning I was up first so I fed them and they played. Then they napped. Then they played. Then more napping. 

It's a lovely life. Digits below.

digits

exercise: 12/12 hours.  Didn't get to the gym, snowing. 5200+ steps by bedtime 

blood glucose:

8am: 160
5:30pm: 160
10:30pm: 143

food:

coffee/water
10:45am: ramekin of mac&cheese w/bacon
11:30am: Protein shake, metformin
12:30: bowl of BLT salad, extra B!
6:15pm: bowl of chicken sous vide w/a lime cilantro sauce, some white rice
6:45: metformin+jardiance 

Blinded By The Light

I had a light meeting day today, and my last ended at 3:30, so I decided to take a break for myself and go to the gym. And the market. We needed something for dinner, and why not do both. 

The gym was not super crowded, and the high school kids had not shown up yet. I remembered my headphones and pulled up an 80s rock workout mix. Some of the songs were too slow (Sweet Dreams Are Made of This is too slow for a 3mph treadmill setting). But there was a lot on there that was fun. 

While I was debating at about 20 min to keep going or end and go shopping the sun started to set outside the window and hit me in the eyeballs. The guy next to me and his wife both groaned audibly. We laughed a little bit and held our hands up and I got to 23 min (just over 1 mile) and decided to call it. 

I was home by 5:30 with my groceries and the dinner plan. We watched a three part documentary on Charles I and the Parliamentarians and it wasn't bad. A little dry and drawn out. But very interesting historian host and lots of cool London stuff. If we think the USA is in a weird time, that English civil war was bananas.

Digits below. 

digits

exercise: 12/12 hours.  Gym, 23 min/1.05 miles on the treadmill (got off because of the sun in my eyes) 8500+ steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

8:30am: 171
5pm: 156
10pm: 171

food:

coffee/water/tea
10:30am: bowl of greek yogurt w/blueberries
11am: metformin
2pm: pbj on 647 bread
6pm: salmon w/small side salad (mixed greens, cherry tomatoes, red onion, goat cheese, bleu cheese dressing)
7pm: Metformin+jardiance

Late Night Gym

Not really super late but much later than I usually go. One car is still caked in snow/ice and Geoff has been going to the gym lately after dinner. Instead of at 8:30am. So if I want to go, I need to wait for him, or, dig the car out and well, Princess Chrissie is waiting for a warm day to melt all that ice away. I'm supremely lazy, I guess.

8:30pm at the gym things are still hopping. But the high school kids are gone. I did the treadmill and a bunch of people were in the circuit room so I came home. I still had some client emails to send, and a couple other things to check on, so I was happy to get back. 

Nothing much happened today. The dogs played super nice and fun and not as long as they have been. First thing in the morning is wilding time, around lunch/1pm, and then 4pm. There was plenty of sleeping. 

One thing they've been doing is just sitting really nice next to me while I'm on client calls. It's kind of cute. Here's a picture. digits below.

digits

exercise: 12/12 hours. 23 min/ 1 mile walk on treadmill at gym. 10 min in the house walk to push over 10k steps. 10,100 + steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

9am: 161
5pm: 126 (wow)
10:45pm: 188 or 215 depending on which finger we believe

food:

coffee/water
11am: bowl of greek yogurt w/blueberries. Metformin
2:30pm: protein shake
5:45pm: large bowl of rotini pasta w/ground italian sausage, mushrooms, onions, sauce
6:30pm: Metformin+jardiance

A1c update

Stupid fucking A1c went up instead of down. 

I know, I know, the holidays. I ate mashed potatoes. I had stuffing. Christmas Cookies. But I didn't actually think it'd go up. I thought it wouldn't go down. Ya know? And I could have done more, and better. 

My doctor's office called to have me come in for an appointment. I've asked in the past if there is other medication I can/should be on. She said our insurance doesn't cover it. So I want to know who to complain to or appeal to. I don't want to pay a ton of money out of pocket for something, but I do want the stupid number to go down. 

I have to up my game on some fronts like walking, and drinking less. It's dry January, so let's just say I'll be doing "damp" January and all the months going forward. Also we'll save some money as a result. 

Today was busy with meetings. And the dogs were really well behaved together for the most part, but they did have a hell of a wrasslin session and Toffee took a bite to the nose that caused some bleeding. They stop really well when I tell them that's enough. 

There were big naps. Toffee slept by me and Dahlia was on the other couch. Peaceable Kingdom. 

I don't have a picture for today and I don't want to screenshot the A1c chart because it pisses me off. Meh. I'm just grumpy right now and taking a pass on alcohol today on purpose, even though we have plenty in the house. You don't start drinking at 9:45pm. Although Doug just poured a cocktail, watching football.... not for me this late. 

digits below.

digits

exercise: 12/12 hours. no walk. 5600+ steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

7:45am: 171
4:30pm: 191
10:30pm: 177

food:

coffee/water/tea
10:30am: bowl of greek yogurt w/ blueberries, splenda
noon: celery w/pb; metformin
2pm: bowl of mixed nuts
3:45pm: 8 crackers w/pb
6pm: cheeseburger w/bacon and havarti, scoop of coleslaw and scoop of potato salad
7pm: metformin+jardiance

Getting out of my own way

Having these two dogs is chaos. They play hard, loud, and rough for a long time every morning. Dahlia barks in our faces, and we do not know what she wants. She's loud and annoying. I mean, she's cute and shit, and when she's not barking in my face I like her a lot, but. 

I have to figure her out. What the hell do you want, you noisy monster? 

Spending time with her makes me love and appreciate Toffee so damn much. She barks when WE are doing something like getting a leash out to let us know how psyched she is. She doesn't bark out in the yard. She doesn't bark for no reason. If she wants to go out, she stands next to the door and looks at us. Silently.

And she sleeps a lot. She has a lot of energy in tiny bursts and then is done. 

At one point today she was so over Dahlia's bullshit. She got up on the couch with me like "mom. please. Make her stop." 

I said, I feel you, girl, I feel you. 

Around 1pm, I also was over the bullshit and told Doug that I was going to get a nice loaf of crusty bread to go with the nice pork & bean soup he cheffed up, and also go to the gym. I'd been threatening to go to the gym for days. So. Why not? Gym is next to market. Do it. 

The Bills/Broncos game was on TV and by the time I got over to the gym it was the 2nd quarter. I watched that and in total, it was a half hour on the treadmill. The market was not crowded, I found the oaf of crusty bread that I wanted and thought, heck. I need some bloodwork done and the lab is now open on weekends. 

I went over, but didn't have my ID card for the insurance on me so the girl would not do the blood draw. 

"We're open until 5," she said. I told her I didn't think that I'd be back, because once I get back in the house, I'm back in the house. 

I got home, dropped the crusty bread off and said "ya know... Chris. Why? Why don't you just grab your insurance card and go back. It is a mile and a half away. Go. Do it." 

For those of you who know me well, you know that I can't get out of my own way sometimes. And I procrastinate, delay, obfuscate, and make excuses. 

I didn't make any new years resolutions but. Why don't I just say it now that I need to do a better job of just doing shit I need to do. 

I went back, with my card. The girl was surprised to see me back, and I told her yeah ... I need to do better. I need to not put things off that I can just do. Highlight of doing this on a Sunday is there was zero traffic on the huge main thoroughfare I have to deal with. No one else was there, so I was in and out. 

It was actually a real delight. 

Here are some pictures. Digits below. Ignore the dust under the table. 

digits

exercise: 12/12 hours. Gym treadmill, 30 min/1.39 miles; 10,300+steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

8:30am: 156
4:30pm: 182
9:30pm: 198

food:

coffee/water
11:30am: Metformin; bowl of mac & cheese w/chili & spicy queso added
5pm: high noon seltzer
5:30pm: bowl of pork & bean soup w/ crusty bread; metformin+jardiance
2 more high noon seltzers

Year over Year

Friday (I went to bed without finishing the entry) 

My colleague and I were talking about our fitbits. He said "I hate when it buzzes to remind me to do my steps," and I said, honey. That's to remind you to do your steps. 

I try to do my 250 per hour at the beginning of the hour so I won't forget and it won't buzz at me.  Sometimes that's not possible though. I schedule meetings 5 min. past the top of the hour and get up and move. But if someone calls a meeting and they don't do the 5 min. delay, then I'm racing to get the steps in. Luckily, sometimes I can just turn my camera and mic off, and do steps during the meeting.

I noticed that you can look at metrics not just for the day and week, but month by month and year to year so this is the readout of my stats.

2024: 7080 daily steps per day average. 2,591,372 steps total
2023: 5972 daily steps per day average. 2,179,854 steps total
2022: 2488 daily steps per day average. 908, 161 steps total *
2021: 2645 daily steps per day average. 965,338 steps total
2020: 2771 daily steps per day average. 1,014,011 steps total (thanks, pandemic)
2019: 5390 daily steps per day average. 1,967,352 steps total
2018: 4636 daily steps per day average. 1,692,262 steps total
2017: 3295 daily steps per day average. 1,202,556 steps total
2016: 3781 daily steps per day average. 1,383,990 steps total

*I was without a fitbit for 4 months in 2022. Jan-April. Not recalling why but I think the Fitbit 3 that I had died and I wasn't sure what to buy. 

So I've made improvements, and 2025 maybe I'll break 3 million steps in 2025! 

Dog update: Friday they were pretty mellow. Some tug-o-war and lots of outside play. My former manager came over for lunch and we had a great visit. They were unhinged and excited so I had to put Toffee in her kennel just so JW could breathe and not have 2 giant dogs in her face. We don't have a kennel for Dahlia, so she was free range, and after a couple minutes just settled down and cuddled next to JW while we drank tea. 

Last night for dinner, I roasted a chicken and I wanted mashed potatoes and stuffing, so we got mashed potatoes and stuffing. Because I wanted. 

When we went to bed, I actually tried to sleep in the bed with the fam (the fam = doug+dogs) Both dogs decided they needed to be on my side of the bed, Toffee in my ass crack and Dahlia's chin firmly on my lower legs, and her head weighs 9 tons. At one point I wanted to roll over onto my left side, Doug was snoring, I couldn't budge either dog, so .... I went to the guest room. 

I left the door open, and in about 20 seconds Toffee followed me. 20 seconds after that, Dahlia. Then Dahlia left. Then Toffee left. It was musical chairs for a lot of the night with them leaving and coming back. 

Saturday

Doug woke up at 6:30am, and fed them a full 90 minutes before they usually eat. That woke me up and I went to the bathroom, and then they were madhouse playing so I closed the bedroom door and went back to sleep. Eventually they settled down, and I did too. I got up at 8:45, thankful for that extra bit of sleep since the revolving door of dogs was a bit much last night. 

Geoff went to Target, and Doug had him buy the dogs these beef shank bones that are stuffed with some ... something. Toffee loves hers - and of course, no dog on earth can get all the stuffing out so this has kept her busy for a year. 

I gave them each their bones, and Toffee's thing is she'll take something to her kennel if she does not want Dahlia to have it. And Dahlia is smart enough to not go into the kennel with her. 

Dahlia stayed on the couch next to me, Toffee in her kennel, and for 2 solid hours it was chomp, scrape, chomp chomp. 

Then, it maybe got boring. Toffee came out and took Dahlia's bone to her kennel, I took one out and gave it to Dahlia, and this went on and on and on. They both finally went into the guest room where Doug went to "read" (aka - take a nap). 

When the pack woke up, I was going to go to the gym but Doug suggested we try and walk them together. It was cold but not windy, so we tried. I walked Toffee and he walked Dahlia. Both of them were a bit hype, and Toffee is really too strong for me to walk sometimes, especially on semi-icy surfaces. We tried to walk them side by side but they were zig zagging all over the sidewalk. We called it quits and were back in 15 minutes. I did not go to the gym, that was a workout on its own. 

Steelers lost to the Ravens and that was lame. Oh well. Anyway. Digits are below. 

Friday digits

exercise: 12/12 hours.  No walk. 6200+ steps by bedtime (took it easier than I have been, no 11pm 10 minute walk forced).

blood glucose:

7am: 160
5pm: 134
11pm: 186

food:

coffee/water
11:30: metformin; quesadilla on keto fajita wrap w/ cheese & bacon
1pm: a couple christmas cookies with tea
7pm: metformin, roast chicken w/mashed & stuffing, gravy
red wine & diet ginger ale

Saturday digits

exercise: 12/12 hours.   15 min / .47 mile walk. 6400+ steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

9am: 192
4:30pm: 185
11pm: 181

food:

coffee/water
11:30am: peanut butter & jelly on 647 bread; metformin
noon-ish: 2 large christmas cookies
6pm: bowl of linguine w/meat sauce; 2 beers
7pm: Metformin+jardiance

Living In The Now

Today was busy. 

Last night I slept with Toffee in the guest room, Dahlia had taken up my entire side of the bed after I finished brushing my teeth and all. I assessed the situation, and figured it was not worth fussing to get into bed, so I closed the door to keep her in there. Toffee was actually passed out on the couch from all the evening's festivities, and eventually she came to the bedroom and found me. 

 I fell asleep around 1, I think. Doug got up to go to the bathroom at 6, and the dogs immediately started playing and carrying on but it was too early for that nonsense.,. Doug managed to get Toffee back to my bed, and took Dahlia in with him. 

We successfully all slept until 8 when I had to get up to pee. Then we were all up. Because fun was to be had. Brekkie time.

I fed them both separately. 

Toffee was fed first, and then I let her out. Dahlia came out to the kitchen next and inhaled her food. She must have been starving, we didn't feed her last night after we got home and I didn't realize it until I went to bed. I then let her out. They ran and played. Ran and played. Came inside and ran and played. Rough and tumble. Six whole hours.

They shed blood, but it didn't stop them and it wasn't violent. It was the right amount of rough play, the kind of play you hope your big huge tank of a dog can get to play and have another dog who isn't afraid to go at it. 

So much tug-o-war. So much. The ropes that Doug bought in 2023 when we adopted Toffee, or early 2024 are earning their keep, I tell ya. 

It was funny because Toffee's routine is cuddle in my lap and go back to sleep once I start working but that was not happening. No way. No. Effing. Way. She is getting a new routine.

I didn't have a meeting today until 12:30pm, so I could focus on keeping them busy and entertained. When my meeting started, it was still bananas crazy in here and there was barking (throw the ball for me woman!) and bumping into my lapdesk and just big dog-ness going on. I apologized for the chaos happening around me and luckily these were clients who were all about the big dogs. My 2pm, 3pm, 4pm, all same. "Oh hello. This is my foster pup. She's very high energy. She will be vocal during the meeting." 

Around 1pm, they both crashed out. Slept like champions. It was a relief. But the second I got up to do something like, oh, pee or get tea, Dahlia was up and following me. She has to be right on my hip at all times. 

And I forgot how messy Labradors can be. She basically has stuck her entire head in the water bowl, twice. ENTIRE HEAD! And then there's water everywhere. So I've used 4 towels to clean up after her, and did a load of laundry to be ready for the next swimming session.

So yeah, it has been busy.

The night before we went to pick her up, I was having sorrow and stress about getting her. I had an anxiety filled night with little or no sleep. Too much wine so I couldn't just drive to the gym and walk on the treadmill to try and diffuse the feelings. It wasn't because I didn't want another dog in the house, but because I was anthropomorphizing feelings about her and how she may feel. I was thinking (and feeling so sad) that we were on the edge of fucking up her life. 

Where is her "dad," her person? Why is she here? Who are these people? Where are her things? Where is her favorite stuffie? This other dog what the fuck?! What is happening!!!

What is happening, indeed?

I had big feelings on Tuesday night. I didn't know how to express them. I went to the Slack channel at my office for all the pets, it's the best channel. And my coworkers were so kind. I unloaded my feelings, and folks assured me it was going to be okay. 

Dogs live in the now. Dogs focus on where the food is going to be coming from. Now. Is the bed warm? Is there food? Is it scary? okay.  

She may wonder, miss her person, but she also will feel safe and comfortable. She will have someone to play with (and play hard). She hopefully will see her person again. We want her to see him again. and in the meantime, live in the now, dear Dahlia.

And maybe that's who I am saddest for, her person. 

I'm sad that a 53 year old man who lost his partner last year now is recovering from a stroke. I'm sad that his big beautiful boisterous black lab may be too much for him to handle when he is home. I'm sad about a lot of that. But we'll do our best and do our best to do our best. 

And play a lot of rope toys and fetch and .... all the things. 

So she had a good day. In the moment. 

Pictures, and digits below. 

digits

exercise: 11/12 hours. Missed 6pm by a couple steps because I was watching the news. 10 min/.47 mile indoor walk;  7500+ steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

8am: 172
5pm: 131
10:30pm: 163

food:

coffee/water
11am: Metformin
11:30am: BLT Salad
5:30pm: two bowls of tuna casserole
7pm: Metformin+jardiance
red wine & diet ginger ale

The Dahlia

Oh what have I agreed to? 

Okay. Okay. Alright. Okay. Oh my God.

Doug has a coworker who's 53 yr old brother recently had a stroke. She asked for help with his dog while he is in hospital and rehab. And well, Doug asked me, and I said sure. 

Dahlia is a 3 year old black lab (and I said OH! Like the Black Dahlia?) And I figured what the heck, Doug figured what the heck. And yeah. As long as Toffee is good with her it'll be okay. And we know Toffee is good with other dogs. so we'll give it a shot. 

We went to pick her up tonight the next county over and brought her home. She rides wonderfully in the car and is a good bean.  The dogs met through the fence, got some good sniffy sniffies and had some back and forth wonderment. We brought Dahlia into the yard, and she and Toff ran and played. There was rough housing and playing but nothing bad. Okay then. 

Let's go inside. 

From 6pm until 11pm, these two did the usual dog thing. Wrasslin, Face Fighting, tug-o-war, bone chewing. It was literally non stop. Non. Stop. Exhausting. Some blood was shed but we do not know who's blood. We just found blood. 

Doug went to bed at 10, and hoped they'd just come into bed with him and .... go to bed. But they got in bed and continued to do the same shit they'd done for hours. So he kicked them out.

I had a few more things I needed to do, so I hoped Dahlia would just come sit out here with me but she paced and whined and cried, and pulled all the toys out that I put away. Toffee is a little possessive and maybe jealous with her toys, and keeps taking them into her kennel, which is kind of hilarious. Dahlia won't follow her the whole way into the kennel, she stands outside. And then steals the toys.

4 hours of outright chaos. 

I just threw them outside, Jesus I hope that we can just go to bed. I'm already exhausted. But no. They're still going at it. 

I just did an inside 15 min. to burn some time while these two are still going hard. I hope tomorrow is much better and more relaxed. 

And the next 6 weeks? are too. 

I also drank a lot more wine than I should have. 

Pray for me.

Digits below. Better photos in the better daylight.

digits

exercise: 12/12 hours. 15 min / .67 mile indoor walk. 8k by bedtime.

blood glucose:

9am: 187
4pm: 190
11:30pm: 193

food:

coffee/water
11am: English Muffin w/Turkey and hummus
noon: metformin
6pm: 2 hotdogs and a lot of macaroni salad
7pm: metformin+jardiance
white wine (not mixed with anything)

HBD GWG

Today my son is 28. Which blows my mind. 

For some reason I'm mentally okay when I think of how old Jess is (32 on the way to 33) but the fact my son is 2 years younger than my favorite co-worker buddy, kind of is a lot to process. 

He came upstairs this morning and Doug and I were both quick to wish him a happy birthday. He looked incredibly happy. Which made me happy. 

I asked where he wanted to go to dinner. He did not hesitate, and picked a little artisanal pizza joint the next town over, which is stupid expensive but really good. Hell yeah, it's yer birthday buddy, let's go. 

He walked to work (which if you ask me is bananapants, it is 25 degrees out and windy) but we picked him up when it was time. He came home and got changed, and it was pizza joint ahoy. We had a lovely dinner. 

I wish Geoff had friends. I wish he had a social circle that he reveled in. I'm so happy he's here with us, and he seems happy, but when you're 28 you deserve more. 

Maybe in 2025 this. This will happen for him. In the meantime. I love this guy. 

Digits below. 

digits

exercise: 12/12 hours. no walkies.  Edit: Anxiety walk inside for 10 min/ .44 mile walk just before midnight  to get some steps in. 7600+ steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

9:30am: 191
5pm: 243
9:45pm: 201

food:

coffee/water
10:15am: english muffin w/pb and bonnie maman's cherry preserves
11am: metformin
a couple christmas cookies while watering the plants
5pm: slice of left over quiche
6pm: beet salad w/goat cheese, 2 slices of sausage and pepper fancy pizza; 2 beers
7pm: metformin+jardiance
vodka tonic
8:30pm: 2 baby bells
9:45pm: ramekin of mixed nuts

Deer Snow

Snowmageddon 2025 is real, y'all. We got snow. The Snow Hole was filled. I'd guestimate about 6 or 7 inches total. And maybe another inch. 

That's a lot, for here. 

Toffee woke up at 5:30 and was frantic, so I took that as a sign, she needed out. So I let her out and she did whatever it was she had to do. We went to the guest room and looking out the window as I was drifting back to sleep, I admired the fact that indeed, there was snow. They got the forecast right, those ... experts. 

I woke up at 7-ish, our neighbor's dog barking her head off got me to pay attention. It wasn't regular barking. I sat up to see light coming up in the yards a bit (we're gaining back light now, friends), and there were two deer contemplating a leap into our yard from the house behind us. Toffee was fast asleep, didn't see them, and I'm glad they weren't out there at 5:30am. 

They thought better of it after sizing up the situation, and walked back to the street. I grabbed my camera and nabbed a shot of them. So pretty. 

Work was hard today and my head and heart were not in it. I may call out sick tomorrow. I even tried to take a nap today, and I was under the flannel sheets and fleecey blanket so you know that's weird for me. I'm usually hot hot hot. Maybe I'm coming down with something. Meh?

Doug shoveled the walk and dug the car out. Geoff asked for a ride home from work so he was gracious to go get him. And I was thankful. Got a 20 min. indoor stroll on the books as a result. I thought about going to the gym but I figured they were closed, like everything was closed today. For 7 inches of snow. Heh. 

Here, Deer. And digits below.

digits

exercise: 12/12 hours. 20 min indoor walk / .99 miles; 7500+ steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

8:30am: 146
4pm: 177
10pm: 242 (thanks, pasta)

food:

coffee/water
noon: metformin
12:45: BROST salad (bacon, red onion, spinach, tomato) with mayo
4pm: apple w/pb (so hungry)
6pm: large bowl of mac & cheese with hamburger (should have made something different...); metformin+jardiance
no wine/etc