Wow. 2021. I've been keeping this blog, as of this summer, for 20 years. Part of me wants to go through and edit/fix/massage content. Other parts of me are like...... why. We'll see if I get to that.
Today being January 5th, I'm happily home, on the couch, did 4 hours worth of actual work today, have a lot of meetings scheduled tomorrow and am honestly evaluating what to skip/dodge. I feel like I have about a 2 hour threshold before I get very tired and want to go lie down.
I slept until 11:00 today, flopped around sweating in bed because Doug had put the heat up. He was cold, I was roasting. It was very unpleasant. I got up, picked up the laptop, checked the email. Noticed some back and forth between colleagues and I had some helpful old school info to assist them in troubleshooting. I wrote a note to my teams to let them know that I was going to do my best to do things, mostly answer easy tickets, not get too embroiled in problems. I got a direct message on slack from a station person who I have a love/hate relationship with asking for some direct help. Healthy me would have just answered him directly and guided him. Sick me pointed to my slack status as "on medical leave..." and asked him to reach out to my team. Even the love/hate people that I work with are amazing in most situations and he was super apologetic. He asked me why I replied, and I said "you sent a direct message, so no matter what it alerts me even if my alerts are off... I'm glad you did. This way you can get the help you need.
Today I did about 4 hours of work. Tomorrow morning I have a telehealth meeting with my PCP, I like her a lot, she'll request some bloodwork, I'm sure, so I'll have to figure out time/place to get over to the lab. Someone through our insurance also told me that they have Drive-Thru Phlebotomy units, which cracked me up. Maybe I'll go to one of those.
My company keeps everyone's sickness/health very private, so people knew I was out but didn't know why. But to be honest, anyone who couldn't guess why someone would somehow suddenly disappear and be out on medical leave is not a smart person working at a news organization.
I actually posted about my being out sick in our Pokemon slack channel. While I was in the hospital, there was a pokestop just out of reach of my room, at the east end of the building near the Emergency Room entrance. So I told people knowing they'd tell people.
Once people saw me back on Slack as active the reach outs began. Several people told me they had Covid as well. One of them I knew of, her daughter's daycare had an outbreak and the daycare director, the "Abuletta" passed away as a result. So I knew MS was sick with it in September. She told me that she pushed herself to get back fast and ended up taking another 2 weeks off. Another colleague got it through her kids at that same daycare. She and her husband were a wreck, and the kids were so fine. A toddler and a pre-schooler. And mom wiped out on the kitchen floor just laying there talking one of the kids through how to make toast and to not use too much peanut butter.
We had a good talk about stupid healthy kids. She's just now feeling better - same sick time, September.
Food is still weird. One of the big symptoms of this, and it is buck wild, is loss of taste/smell. Thing is, it isn't actually loss of taste. Loss of smell, yes. Doug woke up one night and got out of bed and went through our bathroom closet to find all the smelly things, the soaps, the shampoos, the essential oils that he hates, the toilet bowl cleaner. He went to the kitchen and opened the spicy mustard, the horseradish, opened the trash which was pretty full and probably stank - nothing.
In the morning he told me about his experiments. I asked him to smell my armpit, because I had not showered in like 4 days, and he told me it didn't stink. I couldn't smell anything either.
We had Chinese food and Pizza, both of which tasted like absolute shit and made me sad. I so desperately want fried rice, and Doug is against ordering anything because it is a waste of money since I can't taste it.
He's right, but I still would like to be disappointed. And make the decision for myself as I smile through how much it sucks.
Last night I wanted mac and cheese so bad. It is bad for you. I know, it is nasty. But my dumb body and brain thought it sounded pretty great. Doug went to the market, first mistake was going to Aldi and buying their brand, not going to like the REAL market and getting Kraft Deluxe or something. I thanked him. So much. Thank you for going out and buying my garbage brain some garbage food.
I made it. I made ground beef to go in it. I had just enough salsa to give the Aldi Lame Brand some flavor. It was horrible. I grimaced through the waxy flavorless mess and ate two giant bowls. Doug and Geoff ate it too and they were very happy. But I was disappointed, though no longer hungry.
I have found incredible joy though.
Aldi makes a wonderful Sourdough. Slices are too big for the toaster so you have to flip the slice halfway through. Taking the bread out, slathering it with pre-melted butter and topping it with sour cherry preserves, I found the one thing that I can taste that tastes, smells, and is amazing. I hadn't eaten preserves like this in forever, I'd bought them for filo dough cups and goat cheese appetizers for work, this was amazing. Finding this in the fridge, untouched and ignored for like three years, oh my joy. Oh my heart. It made me so happy. So very happy.
So there are smells. There are tastes. It just isn't everything, and it is not the things that I want it to be.
Oh and on another note, I realized today I have not had any alcohol since December 16th. I had a glass of wine with dinner, and then kind of got sick. That was the night Geoff got sent home from work sick... and the rest is history, as they say.
I'm thinking maybe I'll have a glass of wine tonight but I'm worried about it tasting like ass and disappointing me. Doug is making sausages with sauce and cheese, and it is honestly nothing I feel like eating right now, so I may just have saltines.
Saltines do not let me down.
I regret that Doug did not bring home apples, because I'd happily eat apples and peanut butter tonight.
Geoff's birthday is on Thursday and I feel super bad. We always go to whatever restaurant he picks, he gets to enjoy whatever he wants. He loves Indian food, which is what we had for my birthday and I have a 10% off coupon for them so I may suggest we get from there.
I seriously can't believe he is going to be 24. I've got a lot of feels and thoughts about this milestone. I love him even though I think he brought Covid home to me. heh.
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