What, honey?

 I took my mom over to see her sister today. Auntie Bea is in a memory care facility basically 2 miles from my mom's house but she doesn't go visit. 

Methinks it is depressing. And mom gets a little frustrated answering the same questions over and over. 

Bea recognized us both, just like last visit. So this is good. We went into her bedroom area. She has a suite with another lady named Bonnie, and a living area and shared bathroom. Bonnie's door is always kept closed because Bea wanders in there and wants to know who she is and what's going on. Bonnie was out at lunch in the common area, so the door was closed, and Bea said "I have no idea who she is or where she is, maybe she's dead." No, she's just eating Mac & Cheese. 

Bea says the same things over and over: 

• I'm so tired
• I'm freezing, I'm so cold

I offered to get her a warm fleecey blanket from her room and she asked why. I said "you said you're cold."

"What, honey?"

"You said you're cold."

"No, I'm not." 

A minute later... 

"God I'm so damn cold." 

She thinks mom and I still live in New York. I don't correct her that I spent 30 plus years north of Boston and now seven in Maryland. I just said "oh I live in Maryland now." My mom told her she lives around the corner from where they are, and Bea says "What, honey? I didn't know that. When did that happen?" 

Mom says "18 years ago."

"Jesus Christ, I must be losing my fucking mind!" 

Wash.
Rinse.

Repeat.

They got on the topic of their mom. My mother and their mother (My Gammy) did not have a good relationship. Bea did. But also would tell my mom not to talk or say anything, she'd handle it when it came to her. My mother loved her dad, and was devastated when he died. He had an aneurysm, and mom described him scratching at the bathroom door, trying to get gammy's attention and she didn't hear him. And he died. 

Pretty sure my mother blames her to the center of her soul for that. Not that anything could probably have been done for him in the early 60s with an aneurysm like that. 

Bea said "Well, his vacation is over. He had a good long break but now he's got her to deal with again, and here we are." 

Indeed, here we are.

We visited for about an hour. There wasn't a puzzle to work on the table, but they talked about it. Bea doesn't remember doing the puzzle last time we were there. Mom sure does, and how mad she was at it when the pieces were missing. 

Bea is going to be 80 in November, mom will be 81. I wanted to get a picture of them, got a sneaky one which is unflattering to both of them, so I won't post it. 

I thought about recording the conversation. It's actually kind of fun answering the same question and seeing the surprise in her eyes. My mom gets a little frustrated but I think she thinks it is funny when I talk to her and answer the repetition questions. 

This all comes to an end tomorrow afternoon. I'm telling you, I'm happy to have some time up north with C, but I truly can't wait to go home. I miss my dog. I miss my husband. I miss Geoff. Ready to rejoin my small gang.

No picture, just digits. 

exercise: 11/12 hours of 250 steps. Somehow missed 12? I thought I nailed it. No walk outside today, raining. 4500+steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

8:45am: 181
5pm: 203
10:30pm: 181

food:

coffee/water 
12:30pm: Metformin
2pm: left over rice from dinner last night, a huge amount of fajita chicken, cheese, guac, sour cream, salsa. Basically another Burrito just without the wrap.
7:30pm: triscuits and peanut butter; metformin+jardiance
white wine