Never Saying "I'm sorry to hear that"

Today I messaged a colleague on Slack to see if he and his wife were going to see Guster on Saturday. He wrote back "Sadly, no. But have fun."

My reply was "oh that's too bad, it would have been nice to see you. Maybe at a future gig." 

He wrote back, "Actually, Guster is more of my wife's thing. I'm not really into the band. We're in the process of splitting up. I'm not your target audience for this kind of question." 

And I thought. "Eeeek. Wow." Uncomfortable. 

I didn't quite know what to say. I wrote back "oh. Thank you for the update. Wishing you the best." and left it at that. 

I didn't want to say "I'm sorry to hear that," because what if he's not sorry it is happening. What if she's not sorry they are splitting up. What if this is a good thing for them, I don't know from my vantage point and position. What if he's mad, she's mad, they don't need some stranger having feelings about their divorce. 

Still. It is a reaction we all have to say something like that when we hear... something like that. 

"My dad died."  
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."
"Don't be, he was a fucking monster."

That kind of a situation. You don't necessarily know what the other person is going through. It could be the best thing that has ever happened to them. In this case, I'm not sure. they seemed nice. I had only met them together once well before the pandemic. And a lot of life has changed since the pandemic, hasn't it? 

Perhaps I can say something like "I'm sorry you are going through this right now," as an option. 

So many of you are going through a thing right now. And I'm sorry you are.

Today at work I was very busy. It was our CEO's goodbye party. So I tuned in on Zoom and it was very nice. 

I then got a horrible headache. Just supremely horrible. So I tried to go offline from work and got pinged to proofread some comms for an email that had to go out. My boss didn't notice I had posted in the team slack that I didn't feel good and was going to lie down. 

Geoff got home and I had started dinner and he took over so I could go rest again. I love that about him. I did 80% of the work and he drove the car home. 

Oh, speaking of cars, our Mini is not able to be repaired by the garage. We have to get it to the dealership. The computer that runs the ignition has failed. They aren't sure if it needs to be rebooted or replaced, but we'll have to arrange for another tow. 

I've tasked Doug with picking which dealership we'll go to. The thing with AAA is you get one free tow a year, so, this next one will cost us whatever it costs. Based on yesterday's post, it's not a big deal. We'll get it done. 

I'm relieved that I planned on flying to NY to meet up with Linda instead of planning on driving. Now I have to talk to Doug about whether or not I just take the Dodge to Baltimore on Saturday for the overnight, or go with Sara and Sean. I like having our own car in case we decided to go toodleaboot before going to the airport on Sunday. I don't want to impose on Sara and Sean for us to get Linz to the airport and all. 

Well, the headache is still here, I'm going to take my tired head to bed. I did get vacuumed and tidied up, and tomorrow morning will do the kitchen. I have one meeting tomorrow and I may just call out sick for the day with this headache. And what with needing to do car things. As long as my colleague with Covid feels like he can come back. 

One sleep 'til Linda. This time tomorrow. Hanging out here. Can't believe it is time.

digits 

exercise: 12/12 hours of 250 steps.  no exercise, but, I vacuumed and moved a bunch of things around. 5k+steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

8:30am: 195
4:30pm: 178
10pm: 165

food:

coffee/water 
11am: Metformin
12:30: 3 bowls of chicken salad (I regret this, even though it was one chicken breast, and it was huge and I should have stopped after 1 bowl and saved the rest)
6pm: small bowl of spaghetti w/meat sauce, 2 pieces of garlic bread 
7pm: metformin+jardiance