What happens in life, when life is not fun

Today was a little bit of a wild day. A colleague reached out to everyone on our cross-divisional team to let us know he'd been diagnosed with Guillain-Barré, spent several days in the hospital, and is now home but not ... better. 

Better will be a ways off. 

Another good friend let me know they have separated from their spouse, living in the same house, parenting the kids, but it is not going smoothly. 

I have another friend who is going through some massive life shit. She and I chatted for a little bit today. "I literally can't tell another person about how I'm feeling right now," they said. "I can't talk to my parents, my sister, my boss. I think I need to take time off soon. I wish it was still summer, my kids and I could just use some of my vacation time and go someplace and just have a little fun. None of life is fun right now. What happens in life, when life is not fun?"

Basically I let her know that I have no idea what happens in life when life is not fun, but I'm there for her if she doesn't have anyone to talk to. I asked if she's seeing a therapist, or have some sort of professional help (yes she is, and  so thankful for it). I encouraged her to journal, write down one good thing that happened today. Just one. It can be a sentence, a word, but just try to find a one good thing. Just to keep going. Also told them to listen to Guster. 

Ha. 

If they can muster up the energy, one good thing. Just go and maybe do a kindness for herself. A little walk. A nap. An extra shower. A hot bath. A cookie. Just one thing.

And some of you reading this are in the middle of your own things. And I see you. Love you. Pray for you. Here for you. All that. 

It isn't all awful news, but news that makes me feel a certain way. I have other friends who just found out they'll be grandparents soon. That makes me smile, but it also makes me a little sad because I have always felt like I'd be a super awesome grandma, and that doesn't seem to be in the cards for all the honest reasons. 

I look forward to their new family member soon and watching that bean grow up. Oh and one of Geoff's classmates and his girlfriend just announced they are expecting. I guess I can't be surprised, because he's 28 already. How did the kids get to be 28? Huh. 

So it's been kind of a weird day. Overall, just weird. Peopley weird. 

I had kind of a manic stretch today. I could not find my fitbit charger. Mind you, I have two. But I could not put my hands on either one. I know I packed one and took it with me because I successfully charged the fitbit last week at C's house. It needed a boost, and it let me know, so I said "oh okay, it's gotta be in my.... suitcase? Carry on? Purse? Where the hell did I put it? 

[chaos ensued]
[swearing happened]

Eventually I found it. It had fallen out of my carry on bag and onto the rug in my room that is the same color. But I hate not being able to find something when I literally know, I just had it. I had it the other day. Gah. 

My brain. 

Anyway, I took a picture but I'm saving it for tomorrow. Ha. Digits below.

digits

exercise: 12/12 hours. 23 minute indoor walk. 7k+steps by bedtime

blood glucose:

8am: 164
5pm: 187 
11:30pm: 169  

food:
coffee/water
12:15pm: english muffin w/pb; metformin
1:45pm: entenmann's chocolate donut (damn you, Geoff!) Some yogurt w/blueberries but the yogurt was weird so I didn't finish it.
4:30pm: pepperoni, cheddar, green olives, just like yesterday
6:30pm: Metformin+Jardiance
white wine