A Guy Named Brian

When I was in high school, I wanted to be friends with the kids who were in the rock bands. 

And the girls that hung around with them. 

I really wanted to be part of that scene, but they didn't want me. I know I've mentioned this before but it took me years to find my people, and in some ways I regret the amount of time I spent trying to hang out with the wrong (for me) crowd. They were all (and still are) wonderful people. As an adult, I'm friendly with them on the social medias. 

One of them passed away this week, as a result of cancer from what I gather. Several people have been posting their memories of him, and the stories are delightful. He was an amazing guitarist and bassist, and musicians who played with him over the years extol his virtue and virtuosity. We weren't close, in fact, he didn't go to our high school but was at the Catholic school in town, so I didn't get to see or know him much. Just knew him from the bands he was in. 

My birthday was in November, and I was 17, not yet 18 like most of my friends. And at the time in NY State 18 was the legal drinking age. I was 18 for all of a month and a week before they raised it to 21, and I was going to college in a state where it already was 21. 

Basically, I wanted to go see his band (a bunch of us we were all home from college as I recall) and there was no way I was going to be able to get into this bar. Someone, maybe my friend Patti who was dating the drummer, got Brian to get his sister's expired NY state driver's license. I think she was 5 years older than he was, than we all were. So he gives me the license, probably thinking "who the hell is this person" and questioning whether or not he should do this. I don't know. We never talked about it. 

We go to the bar and the bouncer isn't having it. Back then, there were no photos on the licenses in NY, they were just stupid blue cards. And this one was not in the best condition. I didn't look like I was born in 1961 or whenever it was that his sister wsa. The license had expired and my excuse was "yeah, I go to college and ride the bus around town, I guess I forgot to renew it." 

Patti goes and gets Brian, who is already inside, and he comes over to vouch for me, calls me his sister's name and says to the guy "yeah, she's legit."

Bouncer dude is not one to argue with a guy from the band, so, I got in. I played it cool for the show. I think it was the only time I was able to go to one of these shows in a bar. 

I don't remember much about it. I just remember the license, memorizing her birthdate and her social security number, and that's about all.

All I know is that he was exceptionally kind, when he didn't need to be, and that memory I have of him (that and how he could shred the fuck out of "Can't You Hear Me Knocking" by the Rolling Stones) is something to cherish.